Floor plan optimization city villa + fill consideration

I also somewhat regret that we didn’t plan a sliding door. It seemed too modern for us somehow because we didn’t know it. We planned a lot only the way we knew and couldn’t break out of our shell. And now it’s done.

I think I advised you weeks ago to get a sliding door and you always declined... I find them really practical. And I think everyone regrets something after building. Our architect also didn’t advise us on window sizes, we had to figure everything out ourselves. And in many places, I would do it differently now. You just have to live with it or break open the wall again later if you can’t live with it. If you want to be sure, build a model house that you have already been to. Everything else is always accompanied by uncertainty.

I think you should finally say goodbye to the "perfect" house. Like probably every builder, you will still find many things after construction that you could have done better. I also planned a lot and racked my brains until it seemed right to me. Still, there are a few things I would do differently today. But you can live with that. Either you can correct it sometime or get used to it. Draw a line under the planning, which seems to be finished anyway, and just start with colors for the walls, furniture, etc. You can spend hours on that too – and it’s also easy to change if something doesn’t fit.

I think I already advised you weeks ago to get a sliding door and you always declined... I find them really practical. And I think everyone regrets something after building. Our architect didn’t advise us on window sizes either, we had to figure everything out ourselves. And in many places I would do it differently now. You just have to live with it or break the wall open again later if you can’t live with it. If you want to be sure, build a model house you’ve already visited. Everything else is always connected with uncertainty.

I will be able to live with it. I always have a hard time deciding, always want to make the right decision, and am perfectionistic. But apparently I can’t manage that with house planning.

True, you pointed that out to me! But we decided against it because back then we weren’t ready for so much glass. My husband doesn’t want to sit in a glass house. And we don’t look out onto nature, but rather onto houses. Then we see at the neighbor opposite that the sliding door is heavy and you can more easily get injured or pinched. These were our reasons for the terrace French doors, which we want to do as a Stulp version.

[A FEW THINGS I WOULD DO DIFFERENTLY TODAY. BUT YOU CAN LIVE WITH IT. EITHER YOU CAN CORRECT IT SOMETIME OR GET USED TO IT]

May I ask which things those would be for you?

I also don't think anything is terribly poorly planned. For example, it's not like we have a room without any windows or anything. And I don't have any oddly shaped rooms or whatever you call it. Everything is nicely straightforward. My inner Monk is happy about that.

It also comes down to the fact that I can only plan what my husband ultimately approves. Compromises inevitably arise from that. For example, I might imagine bigger windows, but he would feel like a monkey in a zoo with even bigger windows. But a lot of it comes from the fact that we don’t know it any other way. For example, none of our friends have built a house. If we spent more time in new buildings, we might have made different decisions.

Our architect didn't advise us on window sizes either; we had to figure everything out ourselves. And in many places, I would do it differently now.

And can you live well with that? So you also had an architect who only drew and didn't provide advice/no input?

I would probably want to build again sometime with the new experiences. But my husband won't go through it a second time with me. It's probably better that way, too.

So, please don’t take this the wrong way, but if you’re already driving yourself crazy like this (and wow, your inability to make decisions is really next level crap) you should seriously consider getting professional help – otherwise you’ll eventually lose it! And like I said, please don’t misunderstand. I believe that 90% of all people need therapy, but unfortunately only a tiny fraction realize it. You, on the other hand, at least see that your behavior in this regard is "not quite normal."