Construction progress: Duplex with WU basement and developed attic

No one judges.

Yes, Yvonne, indeed judgments were made on well over 100 pages in total.

And even though you like to hold up a mirror to the questioners and often put your finger on the wounds - often justifiably - a somewhat more nuanced presentation of the topics would sometimes suit you well too.

To the OP: I find it very unfortunate that you no longer want to continue the thread, I found it very interesting to read and would have liked to follow along to see how the house hopefully gets finished in the end (I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you!). I also really have to say, "Hats off" that you shared your experiences here; in times of omnipresent "We only show our life highlights and everything is always going so well," it is very hard to step up and report in a forum how things definitely should not go. Honestly, I can understand why the first impulse of forum members was to want to give well-meaning advice, because most people here explicitly ask for help or advice. Maybe it should have been made clearer from the start that no more help is needed here but rather just to warn, tell, and maybe let off a bit of steam. On the other hand, no one really wishes such a catastrophic construction on anyone, and I do agree with the OP that the tone in the forum sometimes changes very quickly and judgments are thrown around; I'm not surprised that people become more sensitive and also react extremely irritated. In the financing forum, arguments regularly fly and people have to justify their individual life decisions and endure prejudgments—why does that have to be? Sure, if you think the OP sees something wrong technically or you feel you yourself made the same mistake once, you can express that respectfully and cautiously, but it always depends on the HOW. Would you say to your best friend whose sh*tty husband just cheated on her, "See, I always knew it, MY Hans-Dieter is faithful out of principle," or would you rather say, "Oh man, I'm really sorry, you don't deserve this, do you want to talk about it?" Exactly :)

It is probably being portrayed somewhat distorted here: TE reports and responds to sympathy and encouragement quite favorably. Those who doubt her actions and question this and that get their warning wagging finger. But not only that: no one calls the words "quarrelsome" or "know-it-all" (at least I have not noticed this in the majority, and if an individual has said it, you still have the report button because of insult), "stupid" I don't know now, maybe... anyway. This: comes from the TE directed at the users, who mean well, but whose opinion she does not like. One could see the thread progression in such a way that she pushes away all those who do not want to dance to her tune here. Bashing? If she does the same with the craftsmen, who are supposed to work without margin, then somehow everything is understandable. That is why, for example, my "initial post". The butcher already got the bashing in the headline, if you look at it precisely :cool: see above.

: If you would read what you write, I would say you are currently proving the exact opposite. You do not actually name the words, but your statements exactly reflect them.

Since I was probably somewhat the trigger for the current "bashing" (and have apologized for it, although I'm not sure if the OP even received that): Posting the note from Willi, who was obviously overwhelmed by the German language, annoyed me. I don't think it's good if someone who is probably not entirely error-free themselves, and under the assumption that the OP had also hired the scaffolder, even if anonymously, makes fun of others like that. Or rather, I would find it harsh to assign a job to someone who possibly presents themselves that way externally, and then "put myself above them" like that. But since that was not the case, I have apologized for my choice of words. However, I do find it unfortunate that this was met with very hostile reactions as well – though I have some understanding for that. However, and I agree with this too: Trying to forbid other users in a forum from expressing their opinion is at least unfortunate.

I apologize to you, after reading my answer again it really sounds stupid and especially not how I meant it. Besides, I think I somehow mixed up your thread – wasn’t there someone else whose everything was messed up but who insisted on having everything done only by the cheapest (and most unprofessional) provider? Anyway: Sorry. I didn’t mean to lash out.

: Yes, you apologized. But in doing so you immediately made it worse again, since I was exactly the one you mixed me up with. So – forgiven, as well as my answer. However, I can assure you that you are not the only one and not the cause.

I do find it a pity, however, that there was a very toxic reaction to that as well - although I do have some understanding for it. However, and I also see it that way: trying to forbid other users in a forum from expressing their opinions is at least unfortunate.

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: And once again, as already written in #409. I did not react to you, neither toxically nor in any other way. The answer concerned a different context.