Depression after notarized contract - experiences

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Fears are a feeling and feelings change! You are letting us share an honest snapshot of your feelings, and I want to thank you for that. Please consider above all else: feelings change, they will not accompany you in this form for your entire life.

Please provide some information about your financial situation so that we can help relieve, reassure, or also assess "It’s tight, but still the right decision" from an economic standpoint. Basically, I want to say that considering rents continue to rise, more and more banks charge "penalty interest" on savings, and you have or plan to have one or two children, deciding on your own home is very good.

Would you like to tell us in which region your new house will be located?

Now to your fears: everyone deals with fears differently. Personally, I try to minimize fears through facts. Please visit a consumer advice center of the consumer protection association and provide your financial key data here. Also, I think you could once talk to your family doctor and someone who knows your financial situation well. And if your fears come up at night and you cannot sleep, please call the telephone counseling service (they are not religious, even though the name is historical).

If we know more about your situation here, we could create a pro and con list together. And, as you’ve correctly recognized, you can still back out of the purchase at any time, but please don’t do that spontaneously—work out the best decision here with us and other trusted people.

Describe your financial framework. With a house price of 800k, you should have a high income and/or equity. It is well known that such sums are easier to manage that way.

Otherwise, I always find it strange that people don’t buy the desired house over 800k (!!!) because of some kind of pressure. That would be like me spontaneously ordering something at Axxx.

800k for a terraced house is of course quite a hit at first. Nonetheless, one cannot make a final judgment on the situation without knowing the income/asset conditions. With 8k net and 200k equity, everything would be "not so bad." With 7k net and 100k equity, in my opinion, it slowly starts to move towards "borderline."

Maybe the good feeling will come back when you think like this: As long as I don’t die, I somehow have to LIVE somewhere. That costs money. If I don’t inherit a hut – maintenance costs money too – I have to send money somewhere almost lifelong: to a landlord or to a bank. If the framework conditions are right, the built house will belong to me eventually. From then on, life becomes cheaper again. Which of the two options is less annoying for me? I’ll take that one. Life itself costs money outside of the monastery somehow; every child costs money somehow (about 1 Ferrari, until they are financially independent). But these are all just printed pieces of paper (or nowadays just digits on a screen). What is that compared to the feeling of standing on your own land, with your own children? Right: NOTHING! So, don’t worry – just live! It can also end completely unexpectedly, so use the time and don’t brood.

So now we have signed the contract and since then I haven't been able to sleep a wink.

Can you try to imagine that your house is a special form of something as ordinary and normal as a savings account, from which you and especially your child/children already benefit beforehand and not only when the savings account is closed? Instead of putting money into a savings account every month, where the money is then "eaten up" and dissolved by inflation, negative interest rates, capital gains tax, and political decisions, you put money into a better form of savings account and from the move-in date at the latest you enjoy it every day, your children run around in their own garden, and the money even increases. :) Maybe it helps you to imagine that your new house is like a huge piggy bank. Every month you put money "into the piggy bank," for example at the front in the beautiful new mailbox that you can pick out yourselves, and when you open the mailbox at the back with your little key, there is more money inside than you put in at the front.

Can you try to imagine that your house is a special form of something as ordinary and completely normal as a savings account, which you and especially your child/children already have something from beforehand and not only when the savings account is closed?

I also have something to contribute from my old sales activity. It actually works with customers.

A loan is not a loan! That is important to know. A loan is a savings plan with immediate payout and subsequent accumulation.

It sounds much friendlier right away when you receive a payout from a savings plan and the loan installments suddenly become savings installments.