Depression after notarized contract - experiences

You don't have to quit tomorrow. I think you'll probably be able to sublet the apartment temporarily to "test" living there even when the house is finished. Then, after a year, you can still decide whether you want to move back and sell the house (probably at a profit). Or just release the apartment.

Dear Hauskauf1987,

Your fear is understandable. However, "why am I not satisfied with what I have" sounds like a negative, shameful belief that is currently "activated." Such statements are often deeply rooted and generally stand in the way of change. Building a house is, even in these times, a yes to the future. A yes to life. To allowing yourself more space and to hoping for a better future. Even with "only" one child. You are allowed to strive for that. And if it doesn't work out, then you downsize. That is not pleasant, but is that better than constant self-restriction out of false feelings of shame? The bank seems to trust you. Who is this inner voice right now that spoils everything?

I also know the word pfutsch. I just always thought it was spelled "futsch" :-)

Hello,

often it is a problem in our society that people talk about negative feelings or similar.

We come with nothing and we go with nothing.

We have just built new as well, what is the worst that can happen? You can’t pay off the house and then it has to be sold, but life goes on and you shouldn’t hold back your life because of something like that.

Here in Germany we have everything and yet many people are depressed; if you appreciate even small things, you will be able to live much more easily.

It could also be the other way around, that you are depressed because you simply can’t find a house......

Some see the glass half full, others half empty = here the positive perception counts.

Be happy that you have acquired something and enjoy life!!!

one more note:

for me, buying a house is not about our retirement provision. My grandparents and parents own houses. My father also owned one weeks ago, an alternative would be to build on your grandparents’ property, possibly with your brother.

however, that is in the Rems-Murr district, further away from where I grew up. it would be the financially better decision but I never wanted and do not want to go there.

it is tricky, I hope it gets better.

still, question: maybe there are people here who know about this: WORST CASE: I call the developer and want to cancel the contract. How much time could I still take for that now? What is the notary still doing in the background? The developer’s contact person seems very nice, maybe he already had a case like this and waives the contract in exchange for keeping a deposit of €2,500 for example and sells the house to someone else (the houses were sold or definitively reserved within a day in the first phase, notary appointments are ongoing).

I just don’t want to call him now because I want to gather my thoughts first. But is it then too late in 5-10 days or is everything over?

I also know the word pfutsch. I just always thought it was spelled "futsch"

"Fott" is said in Cologne. And "wat fott es, es fott" means not to chew over fallen dice again, but to make peace with a decision. In this sense, it also applies to the opposite, so to speak "wat do es, es do", like now the house of the OP. Inside bathrooms can exist in a mid-terrace house. This does by no means make it unsellable, but would lead me to the thought of comfortably looking for a next house from the new house.

Still question: maybe there are people here who know about this: WORST CASE: I call the builder and want to cancel the contract. [...] I just don’t want to call him now, because I first want to gather my thoughts. But is it then too late in 5-10 days or is everything over?

Exactly from this being too late for a (in my opinion factually not justified) withdrawal, I hope a liberating effect for you. That would be a stable state with which a therapist can work.