Depression after notarized contract - experiences

  • Erstellt am 2021-09-02 08:39:37

tomtom79

2021-09-02 20:37:52
  • #1
Behind the most expensive houses, the most crying is done... I learned this saying years ago. Often I believe that it is true as well.
 

tumaa

2021-09-02 21:03:23
  • #2
Something different, by now I don't believe in your problem

your first post comes with a thread like that, you ignored tips ......if you had been active here for a longer time, it would be different, but the first post with something like that and only signing up because of it?!
 

Hutchinson123

2021-09-02 22:09:41
  • #3
We just took over our terraced house on Monday and that gave us a bit of a setback. The initial euphoria is gone. The garden is quite small after all. Will the neighbors be nice? Etc. Many things we knew before but are only now realizing. I think that’s pretty normal. The place can really do everything (!!!) better than our 56 sqm apartment. But it is our home after all, and I can imagine that parting with it will be hard :( I try not to let it get to me. It’s just not our home yet. The house is completely empty and we first have to get rid of the mess left by the tenants who lived there before. Once our furniture is in etc., then it will surely be our home :) And we were never worried about money. Although we pay off less, we also have a good chunk less income than you. For us, there’s “only” €2600 for two people left after deducting all housing costs. But money really doesn’t scare us. And I’m really a scaredy-cat and a total thinker ;)
 

ypg

2021-09-02 23:11:35
  • #4
Rather not. You have a problem with responsibility, decisions, and changes. You will still have that even when you (already) retreat again. Sorry, but at some point in life you have to realize that running away is not healing?! Recovery?!? How do you want to explain that to your children? Dad didn’t have the guts to buy a house??? I’m the last one to not understand weaknesses, but after having somewhat localized it for yourself, still not addressing it, I don’t understand that. If you say, “ok, I’ll try it, follow through with the purchase. Go to the doctor… and if it still doesn’t get better, the feeling, I can always sell.” Then it was at least an attempt, a step out of this shitty situation! But you are already retreating now! Who is supposed to understand that?
 

majuhenema

2021-09-02 23:23:23
  • #5
That may be so. To be honest, from around page 5 onwards I already found the answers extremely helpful and they made the remaining 10 pages obsolete. Therefore, it makes me very doubtful that you have actually understood them. You have received that advice from many people, including me, already in post #27. I am also on #TeamYourWife On the one hand, it is certainly stressful when wishes haven’t come true as hoped. On the other hand, there are families who don’t have children at all or cannot have any. And even if it stays with just one child, you will certainly not think: “Oh God, so much surplus space here!” Where else? I think that point would drag you into a deep hole in the near future. I want to summarize the whole thing bluntly: A husband with a loving wife and a healthy child buys a house in a desired area, which he can afford and, if necessary, could sell later at a higher price. Instead of enjoying his luck on many levels, he wishes for his old, (too) small apartment back, whose rent is only just below the repayment costs of the house. One reason for this crisis of meaning is also a faulty bathroom window. Viewed rationally, this has something of a satirical reality. If I were in the man’s place, I would quickly make sure not to burden my relationship/marriage/family too much with these absurd thoughts.
 

ypg

2021-09-03 00:00:07
  • #6

Well, it is the cave where you don’t have to cocoon, but can remain a crawler.
I have to be honest: if I were your wife, not for much longer. You drag other/your family into your depression. As a partner, I would watch this 1-2 times, and if no therapeutic help is sought from your side, my love would be put to the test.
Respect to all the women here who manage their single-family homes alone with a fraction of your income.
 

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