When I look at the whole flood of contributions, I cannot imagine that this process is being accompanied in parallel by an architect according to the planning structure based on the HOAI. A building design cannot be generated through forum posts.
It is completely sufficient for the service phases 1+2 (basic evaluation + preliminary design), which seem to be the focus so far, if the architect's proposals, the client's / client's wife's ideas, and the contributions of some accompanying specialist engineers (soil surveyor, surveyor, structural engineer) are coordinated and combined into a building concept. This does not seem to be the case here.