When the dream of the house bursts

But if you think it is stupid to devalue this life philosophy, then you should for your own sake also refrain from mentioning the opposite disparagingly.

Yes, the dear double standards. Guilty.

And I still stick to it. Unfortunately, this year I had two such cases in the workforce who gave birth to severely disabled children. Of course, you are not in their shoes, but within my own circle the impression arises that this is becoming more frequent (and from 35, a woman is by definition considered a high-risk pregnancy). This stems from pure selfishness. First studying and getting a doctorate and building a career, then the panic as time runs out. A few injections then make possible what nature increasingly denies. The bill is paid by the offspring. It makes me want to gag, sorry.

Apart from that, it’s about the type that often – certainly not always – arises from this. The helicopter syndrome is extremely pronounced in older parents.

You only have this one, this CHILD. At 24, when ours arrived, you think, so what, it will sort itself out, then the second came, I was 27. Fell off the rocker in daycare, black eye, oh, it will heal again, blow on it, and comfort, fine. No drama. It goes on like this. But old parents, the world always seems to end immediately. Long pent-up, overblown parental instinct. Karsten

These are then the ones who want to discuss the latest parenting guide in small talk at the playground and whether one should follow this one or rather the one by Guru XY.

I recommend the current bestseller "Verschieben Sie die Deutscharbeit - mein Sohn hat Geburtstag!".

Aside from that, I'm talking about the type that often - certainly not always - arises from it. The helicopter syndrome is extremely pronounced in older parents.

Yes, of course. Older parents are not necessarily older because they have made a career, but because they may have tried for years. The blessing just wouldn't come. Then at some point, the desire to have a child is assisted, and the result of endless waiting, frustration, and disappointment probably has to be protected. I can totally understand that, even though I also criticize it.

I can understand that. Really. It must be horrible to have that wish unfulfilled. Still, it remains highly selfish. And when you then hear how many failed attempts (with termination) preceded it, it really becomes difficult to feel even a flicker of sympathy (for the child yes, for the parents no).

Oops, now my pulse is rising. 1. Nonsense, a woman over 35 is not a high-risk pregnancy. 2. Health risks over 40 are the same and just as high as under 20. What is true is that the risk of trisomy increases disproportionately. 3. I know many older mothers and they are more relaxed than some young ones. We old ones still remember the time when children were allowed to be children. All this early intervention nonsense that has developed in the last 15 years is annoying. We know that grass doesn’t grow faster just because you pull on it.