Good offer for a young family? Buy yes or no

If it stays between 50-100 EUR, it is manageable.
My wife spends 200 EUR per month on plants. I've been trying to make her understand for a year that this won't work for the time being. But I'm not firm enough about it.

Yes, I am currently putting together the household budget to see what the monthly expenses are. So completely giving up everything, that must not happen. Adjusting the lifestyle, yes, but not being able to live anymore, no.

Especially with the household budget book, there is still a whole world between 'splitting a 100€ Edeka receipt into toilet paper & flour' and 'account balance 31.12. vs. 01.01.' I have also been keeping a household book for every euro since 2014! For this, I maintain an Excel sheet organized by main topics and their corresponding subcategories (e.g., groceries = Edeka, discount store, market, butcher, beverages, alcohol). Then there are housing, insurance, entertainment, etc. Each month has its own tab, and there is a 13th tab with a summary for the annual balance. Created once as a blank template, the file can be filled anew each year. I pay by card whenever possible. For cash, I have to immediately note what I spent it on, otherwise it quickly slips through... Especially in the context of a possible house construction, it proves to be a real gain to know your expenses so precisely!

So the house really looks very nice and you can definitely live with the bathroom for now. With the right equipment, you can make a decent bathroom out of it and still tackle it later.

Whether the whole thing is financeable or not, you should take a close look at what is available to you and under what conditions it is financed. Given the volume and the possible repayment, a 10-year fixed term would be far too short for me, because what if interest rates rise? Then after 10 years, it will hit you hard.

In addition to the loan, ancillary, and living costs, you should also consider that you need to build reserves (repairs, new car, etc.). Children also cost money, what about childcare? Furthermore, basically everything depends on one salary, so you should secure the loan accordingly and take a close look at which incomes you consider guaranteed.

What made me suspicious, for example, but maybe it’s just stated incorrectly or I have it wrong in my mind, is that your wife as a nurse could earn 2500€+ net working full-time? We’re probably talking gross instead, which also fits better with the stated parental allowance. Get another thorough consultation on that and calculate it for yourselves to see what remains for living AND also for building reserves!

So giving up everything completely is not an option. Adjusting your lifestyle, yes, but not being able to live anymore, no.

....and what are you trying to tell us with that or then the bank? That it would be mean if....? The word sacrifice is often used hastily nowadays. When does sacrifice begin and up to what point is it simply the price I have to pay for a fulfilled life desire.. By the way, sacrifice has something very healthy about it, and we are not talking about freezing or starving people, which we would then be.

My wife only wants to spend 50 € once a month on fingernails, she doesn’t need anything else xD

I don’t believe that. We all have wishes and enjoy certain things, an honest household budget will show you that. Colored fingernails alone don’t make you happy permanently; that’s maybe something one could actually do without. It’s also not about whether your wife or you spend money on fingernails, subscriptions, etc., but about becoming AWARE TOGETHER that from NOW ON you are basically choosing a “different life” because you now own a HOUSE and therefore some things may be less or no longer possible, or money is often better invested in the design of the house. You then enjoy a new, red sun umbrella instead of previously a chainsaw on the car. It’s about the joint, more frugal attitude. In my opinion, it only becomes difficult if you take that on yourself alone and then have to forbid your wife the fingernail massage because she does not want to follow the common path. That will probably cause frustration on both sides in the long run. It must be a JOINT decision, where everyone consciously pays attention and you can also convey it to children like that. Not that you are poor, but that you bought a nice house for your family and therefore can’t/won’t buy certain things. I find that very simple. In conversations with some people around me, I have already heard... “I just can’t see that, I would never give that up, etc.” Okay, I think, that sounds childish right now, then maybe a house won’t work because you have fixed payments to the bank. Ultimately, you have to assume that you will have to pay this price plus additional costs on the house for a working life. Complaining doesn’t help, the family’s life must be organized accordingly. If the feeling of self-denial or constant sacrifice remains, I wouldn’t do it because you can’t keep that up forever; then you just don’t have a house, so you have to do without.

There is currently an opportunity to buy a house. This happens through connections and that is why it is not advertised,

The house would be perfect for us, it was built in 2000, 130 sqm, 5 rooms, large basement with 60 sqm and an attic as storage space.
In addition, there is a double garage and a plot of land with 600 sqm. The entire house and the basement have underfloor heating.

The purchase price is €430k

now let's be honest:
1. why is the house not marketed on the portals where houses are best sold?
2. why is it so cheap when other houses in a similar location (within 50 km around Bad Tölz) cost from €700,000, although they are 10 years older, smaller and have less land?