Maybe very slowly. But now postponing all avoidable costs to the future and thinking that garage, terrace, outdoor facilities, fireplace alongside the house mortgage can be easily saved together, I also consider dangerous. Of course, you can install a fireplace later. But I think the quantity matters. You won’t be able to save big cost blocks afterward that you couldn’t have afforded now. These are the houses where even 5 years after construction, pallets are still lying in front of the entrance because paving has not been done yet. I don’t fundamentally find that wrong either if you go into it with open eyes. But you should be aware of it and weigh whether it stresses you or not. Besides, the OP mentioned that children are planned in the next 3-5 years. What isn’t done and saved by then will have to wait even longer since money will not increase with children and parental leave. And there are plenty of small expenses even after moving in that you currently don’t have and that can add up significantly.
But the acquaintance’s construction company is at least a good starting point. Through contacts, he will surely also have connections to an affordable planner. However, you should have someone on your side who can assist with obtaining the contract. Otherwise, as a layman, it won’t work. And keep in mind, only that one trade of the acquaintance will be cheaper and not tremendously so. He will certainly want an hourly wage too, just maybe a slightly reduced one. Material costs remain. You don’t save easily in tens of thousands that way. That ends up being unrealistic again.
I would plan for all necessary costs. So outdoor facilities, then carport (instead of garage), furnishing, etc., and then get started. I doubt what’s left over. There will probably be significantly more builders who have budgeted the obligatory 15-20k for outdoor facilities and have sunk it into the house instead, and then after moving in have to save up the garden again, than those who still have money left afterward and have built the house according to their ideas.
I would advise planning a house with max 160 sqm. Already calculating the minimum equipment for outdoor facilities, carport (instead of garage), kitchen, and furnishing now. And really having money in reserve for all the small items that will still come.