New single-family house in southern Germany

Your main problem is

...that you are stubborn, as a layman you think architects are unnecessary and stupid, and you do things that you yourself say are naive. You also believe that you are just building a simple little house that you can whip up or even draw yourself. Well then.... If you really mean this outburst of anger seriously, my tip is to do exactly that, namely leaf through a catalog and point to a house.... they are all just simple houses, as you want it. I am really surprised that you, as a declared layman, hammer in such nails.... save that for your own work later, if you ever plan to do any! With such blanket judgments against everything and everyone (just never against yourself) you will end up exactly where many others have already ended up, namely where they really never wanted to go. At some point you get fed up and just say yes. Good luck. I can only advise you too to free yourself from such pub talk; I am really amazed at what you spout as a layman, even though you have not laid a single stone for a house yet. If you had or actually had any knowledge, you would speak differently and not unleash judgment after judgment about the professional group or techniques just because you read or heard something somewhere. Which of your many built houses have your bad architects messed up or where does this insight come from? As soon as your house thread is posted, we will be able to see that it will NOT be a simple house without special requests, but that you, like everyone else, will want to implement your own things. You are from IT, so you are unskilled as you say, your wife as well, so also classic victims, and if you keep ranting like this you will become exactly that. You distrust the professional (architects in general) but find a conversation with a salesperson (usually not a construction expert) good... aha... that makes sense.... I’ve also had two mulled wines. I think architects also consider IT people all stupid because they always bend the software. Hmm... could they be right? With this attitude you will have quite some fun building, better buy something, but only a house that was demonstrably built without architects, that apparently increases quality. Maybe you should have a house built from a 3D printer, that already exists. :D Get off your high horse, go to the local construction company, ask around, listen, question (especially yourself), learn, draw, calculate and start over.... and eventually you will stand with the right business partner who will build your house that fits your budget. Usually it turns out quite different than you thought and that is often a good thing.

Instead of thinking about where you wanted the stairs and where a window has to be, you flip through the catalog and pick a floor plan. At this point, I don't even believe that our needs are so special that they can't be satisfied by a standard house.

Read through the topics where floor plans are discussed; there are many sensible comments that will help you look at the floor plans of all providers from a different perspective. If you enter the house and there is no sensible spot for a coat rack and a shoe shelf in the entrance area, that's already annoying. Or the walk-in closet in the bedroom has 10 sqm of floor space on paper, but can’t be used properly because it has two doors and a sloping ceiling. You put down 20,000 euros and only a 1.5 m closet fits in... Also, you want floor-to-ceiling windows in every room and yet there is no sensible place for the beautiful shelf. All floor plans somehow work, but if you are annoyed from move-in day that the shoe shelf is in the way and the winter jackets crowd the hallway too much, that helps no one. In the end, all jackets end up hanging in the office and then it becomes uncomfortable there.

I think your main problem is that you equate residential construction with house building.

Which of your many built houses have your bad architects messed up, or where does that insight come from?

There are things that have little to do with residential or house construction but are simply just bad. I can understand that you have to make compromises with large houses because you only have one exterior wall, but an elevator that is only accessible by stairs... Someone obviously had the task of drawing up a plan, and who was that if not the architect?
Even if it's not the same thing, in the end it reflects on the entire profession. As an IT person, I can sing a song about how Word and Windows problems get transferred to everything else. I’m not saying architects are completely useless, and my opinion is actually changing a bit because I’m dealing a lot with the subject lately.

In a house with several residential units, I wouldn’t immediately call it decentralized if each unit has its own separate central ventilation.

I think you misunderstood me. I wouldn’t call that decentralized either. I meant that in every room with an exterior wall, a small fan is installed to save the cost of a ventilation system per apartment.

You distrust the expert (architects in general) but find a conversation with a salesperson (usually not a construction expert) good... aha... that makes sense... I’ve also had two mulled wines.

Why should I trust the salesperson? Although everyone has “consultant” on their business card, they are all salespeople. And mostly paid by commissions. I think you are doing me wrong with your post; we’re not as naïve as you think. I spent almost all of November and half of December doing nothing but dealing with the subject of house building. But maybe you’ll see it differently without the mulled wine.

Read through the topics where floor plans are discussed; there are many useful comments there that will help you look at the floor plans of all providers from another perspective.

I am already quite busy with that. You just don’t see it because I hold back commenting on other people’s floor plans. I’m not an expert there either ;)

As soon as your house thread is set up, we will be able to read that it is NOT simply an ordinary house without special requests, but that you, like everyone else, want to implement your own things.

Maybe one more point. Yes, of course we also have "special requirements." Essentially, the problem currently arises from the fact that we wanted to leave out the basement for financial reasons (white tank, probably arsenic in the soil => expensive excavation), but the technical room then strongly competes for space with the study on the ground floor.

There are things that have little to do with apartment or house construction and are simply just bad.

That happens everywhere.....at the baker, at the dentist, with the architect and elsewhere. Therefore, one should make an effort and search. There is no universal good or bad, neither in wall construction nor in heating technology. Everyone has their own feelings and preferences, and these are logically least reflected in a type house. Still, one can decide on that, for example if one does not like to plan and search oneself.

but an elevator that can only be reached by stairs... Someone obviously had the task to draw a plan, and who was that if not the architect?

....see for example airport BER....of course rubbish is also built, nevertheless I would rather take a positive view. If you consciously look for beautiful architecture, you will find it; there are also young, innovative architects but also such house builders. I find, for example, that Scandinavians often build beautiful houses, although they are not the most expensive. Everyone has to find THEIR own fit. There are some examples in the forum also with pictures of how to build more beautifully with a manageable budget than others.

my opinion is changing a bit right now especially because I am dealing with it a lot.

Very good. Still, one can/must be critical, definitely. But to shut oneself off from something from the outset would be downright fatal. I really ended up somewhere completely different than I wanted and thought before and I already have various house-building experiences. It’s a process, the planning, technology, etc.

I think you misunderstood me there. I would also not call that decentralized. I meant that in every room with an exterior wall you install such a small fan to save the costs for a ventilation system per apartment.

Here, too, there is no ONE truth....

But maybe you see it differently again without the mulled wine

No, I always allow myself two for breakfast. I don’t actually judge you, I only suspected some rigidity in thinking and want to tell you that you should let that go but still remain critical; but not generally dismissive, since you can learn something everywhere. House planning takes time or you live with mediocre results. Many do not want to give this time and want the result quickly. I also find that a pity. Planning together, brainstorming, dreaming, putting it aside again, all that should be part of it.

I am not an expert either.

You don’t have to be an expert, who is anyway; every opinion can be important. A house should have something personal and in the end not every “expert” has to understand that. For that reason, I would rather encourage you to also say something about floor plans because every perspective can help someone.

we naturally also have “special requirements”.

Good, so do we!

Basically, the current problem arises because we wanted to omit the basement for financial reasons (white tank, probably arsenic in the ground => expensive excavation), but then the technical room strongly competes with the study for space on the ground floor.

If this is your only problem, it can be solved.....time.....searching.....asking.....as said, our result hardly has much to do with the original idea anymore and now we look forward to exactly that. Start mentally again and again from zero, there are so many ways to Rome; here mostly mainstream is often discussed and very often in my opinion too focused on technology, but there is also much besides that which is equally valid. Everyone should find that out for themselves.

Basically, in builder forums one repeatedly encounters two major cases and a paradoxical phenomenon: many people who start from their individual needs increasingly recognize similarities with proven standard models in the distillation process, i.e., as soon as their design becomes more practical, it also becomes more similar to standard designs – at least for the average consumers with one point six to two point four children and all household members without disabilities; conversely, the path of those who start from catalog models leads more and more towards individual planning in the course of checking whether it really fits. For everyone, the plot, building window, and development plan must be accommodating, otherwise every dream gets a big dent and/or bruises. And: the makers must be at least as capable as the material. The specific building site speaks with the same loud voice as the residents, and even from gold one can build junk.