Refinance existing loans with a construction loan

No, wrong. A financial advisor is like a butcher: "Would you like a little more?" You presented your wishes to him and let him run. You were not to be dissuaded from the plan until the rejection. That's how it reads in the thread. There was even the arrogant statement that you would call the big boss. Sorry to burst your bubble, but in the lending business you are "peanuts" and more of a "pleader" with your project. Regards, the Bänger

I think you are confusing something here. It was not me who planned the financing the way it was submitted, but my advisor!
The topic of calling the boss only came up because it was said that ING probably has an escalation level where my advisor could call to clarify things since the ING employees are not willing to communicate. That I would call there myself would not be possible at all.
I know that the bank does not depend on me and can only pick out the easy cases. So I don’t know what that has to do with arrogance?

I know that the bank is not dependent on me and can just pick the easy cases. So I don't know what that has to do with arrogance?

Wrong, a bank is definitely dependent, otherwise they go bankrupt. They do not pick the easy cases, but those with which they can statistically make money at all. They also do more complicated variants. Your financing request and your personal situation are simply extremely risky for a bank.

Again my question: How much pension will you get together in 20 years?

And which idiot told you that this would work?? It's really ridiculous

Another advisor. We had him before. But he then said that the bank policies had changed as of the first of June and we can no longer finance like that. There is only one option through DSL with a loan amount x. The rest then through DSL private loan with 6.5% over 10 years. However, since this is not enough for the bank because it goes beyond the pension, they want to have a savings balance of about 40,000 proven. He would then transfer this amount to my daily allowance account to prove it, and then I pay him back. Do I need to say anything else? I don't think so..... It's also funny that the DSL with a real estate conditions inquiry is in my Schufa as well as in my wife's. But we never signed anything. Since then, I actually thought it couldn't get any worse....

Wrong, a bank definitely depends on it, otherwise they go bankrupt. They don't pick the easy cases, but those with which they can statistically make money at all. They also do more complicated variants. Your financing request and your personal situation are simply very risky for a bank. Once again my question: How much pension will you get together in 20 years?

Uh, I think it was 3700. I'd have to check again if you want to know exactly.

I would

I rather think this is the minimum. You have to adjust many things, lower the house price, increase the equity, add the pension statement.
Your wife is in early retirement? Theoretically, you are the sole debtor.

No, we both go to work, why?
The advisor has the pension statements.

If you take a step back: in 20 years you will be of retirement age. After that, I wouldn’t want to have more than 50 TE outstanding.

If you have a fictitious 1.3% interest rate, you have a 300 TE loan and with 3.7% repayment, you still owe about 40 TE after 20 years. These plus

"8k own contributions
10k equity"

are around 320 TE. For that, you can barely get a small city villa with 120 or 130 m2.

But you could maybe realize your planned villa with the key data

"City villa 188 sqm on 1400 sqm plot
Plot value 155k"

also on 700 m2 by splitting the plot and build your villa with the 80 TE sales proceeds 30 to 40 m2 larger... the city villa is anyway very economical in base consumption and even 700 m2 is nowadays a really large plot!

Not possible. Building in the second row is prohibited here. So no one buys. Another plot is not in sight. There is nothing nearby. I only bought the plot in 2012 because it only cost 40k.