Feasibility Single-family house - Cost statement / Financing realistic?

My first wedding (I was young and naive) had the full program and was really expensive.. Divorced after 8 years..

My second wedding could not take place due to a missing document from me, we had already canceled everything when on our departure day the DHL courier arrived with the document.

My mother-in-law called the registrar, who agreed to come after working hours. A few neighbors and the family who lived nearby also came. We had the most wonderful weather, the garden's bloom was at its peak. Quickly everyone decorated a table in the garden for the bridal couple, organized tables and chairs for the guests and the food, and the local hairdresser created a hairstyle and makeup for me. Some of the guests helped out partially and everyone was just in a good mood.

A restaurant nearby joined our spontaneous action and delivered the food and quickly set everything up as a buffet.

It was the starting signal for the best days of my life, which have accompanied me now for 11 years. I no longer know what it cost, but nothing significant. The day was so perfectly unplanned for us that it couldn't have been topped, which is why we didn't have the wedding here in DE anymore :)

I don't see any problem at all!!!

For us:
70 × 60€ = 4200€ restaurant costs
Good food, drinks included
Wedding cake included
10 cakes from family/friends
Decorations lovingly handmade and
Banquet hall decorated by ourselves
800€ wedding dress, suit already available
400€ DJ for 3 hours 9 pm to midnight
300€ photographer for 1.5 hours shooting
70€ hairdresser
50€ bridal bouquet
50€ sparkling wine for champagne reception, glasses borrowed
0€ friends as vocal choir, instrumentalists in the church

That makes 6000€ plus some small things here and there, so probably a bit more.

I find many details missing in many lists I occasionally hear. Some things are simply not mentioned...

We also do the decorations ourselves, but.... Neither the candle holders nor the small items or whatever else you need are free. We had material costs of about 500€. It is certainly possible with less, but 0€?

A wedding car or honeymoon should also be included, as well as the rings... These three positions alone quickly amount to a high four-digit sum.

One might then ask why the gentlemen who think they have to celebrate in the Rococo Hall then "demand" 500 € as a gift from the guests in order to cover their costs.

No one said anything about 500,-. But 100,- would already be my limit of shame. There are also people who simply aren’t that well off. If I invite the uncle with the reduced earning capacity pension, then I have to be prepared that there won’t be 200 euros in the envelope. Both the bridal couple and the guest have to be able to estimate all that a bit. Just like with the dress code. Shirt and jeans are okay at the garden party, but as a host in the Schloss Hotel Wilhelmshöhe, I don’t want to see that.

But whether the bride marries in a beautiful dress costing 100€, 1000€ or 8000€, as a guest I get nothing from that. Of course, it should look somewhat like a wedding and not like old rags. Just as little have we given friends who spent 6000€ on their band more than other friends without a band. Ultimately, the wedding without a band was also nicer for us personally than the one with a band because the band organized terribly embarrassing and unpleasant games. Should I then deduct 20€ for that? In Bavaria, there are many weddings without drinks; then we actually give less because those costs also get added on for us.

For the cost price, you don’t take the dress, band, decoration or something like that here, but the consumption.

We had material costs here of about 500€. It’s certainly possible with less, but 0€?

A wedding car or honeymoon should also be included, as well as the rings... These three items alone quickly add up to a high four-figure amount.

Our decoration material costs were two-digit.
Flower decorations from the huge flower garden of the victorious in-laws. Glasses from the family’s possessions were used as vases. A few craft materials of course.
I also wrote that 6000€ would not be enough because here and there something else was added, but up to 10k there is still plenty of room.

Rings could still be added. Our civil wedding was 1.5 years earlier and therefore no longer part of this budget planning.

The wedding car was from the family, so cost 0 euros.
We didn’t spend a single euro more on the honeymoon than the year before either. It was a fantastic almost 4-week backpacking tour through Thailand with wonderful memories.

It doesn’t bother me if someone wants to pay more, but it’s possible under 10,000€.

For the cost price, you don't take the dress, ribbons, decorations or something like that, but the consumption.

Yes okay, but we do it similarly then. Without drinks, there are fewer. Probably for a garden party as well, but we've never had one.
For a luxury party with caviar, there wouldn't be more from us, because then it's their business.
I like potato salad better than caviar anyway...