How quickly should one pay off a house?

(on the contrary: we are in debt!).

Actually not, since the value of your property exceeds your debts.
Theoretically, by selling the house, you would be debt-free from one moment to the next and even have a good amount left over.
Probably even more than the "average German".

Actually not, since the value of your property exceeds your debts.
Theoretically, you would be debt-free overnight by selling the house and even have a decent amount left over.
Probably even more than the "average German."

That is the difference between being indebted and overindebted. As homebuilders, we are probably all indebted, but not overindebted.

According to this logic, for example, managing directors, board members, or professional footballers shouldn't have to worry about their financial situation anymore. I don't think that's wise. And I also don't think you could allow me not to pay any attention to money at all – after all, we are far from having arrived (quite the opposite: we are indebted!).

You only know black or white. Shades of gray are unknown to you.
I can certainly understand your thoughts. We also reconsider every investment, probably twice too often each time, but not because we necessarily want to make special repayments, but because we ask ourselves whether it really has to be or if it is just a spontaneous idea that won’t even matter three days later, and whether what we want to buy is really good or will break quickly. Moreover, every consumer good bought involves resources and energy.
If you can live with the old car, then keep driving it. If it becomes uneconomical, then replace it. Unlike other consumer goods, such vehicles do have a second life because they can still be economically operated in other countries.
If it helps you find peace of mind, then consider your repayment as rent. A tenant also wouldn’t pay rent for several years in advance.
If money automatically remains, you can still make special repayments. But making all other decisions dependent on that and possibly not being able to sleep peacefully anymore is not the right way.

a bit off topic:
The automotive sector will be interesting in the coming years anyway. Manufacturers will switch to direct sales like Tesla in the long term, reducing dealers to intermediaries or service workshops at most. Small dealers have been made life so difficult for a long time that they either sell to bigger dealers, only broker for bigger dealers, or give up.
Currently, models are being rigorously discontinued. This applies to both large engines to reduce fleet emissions as well as small and base models. Prices are rising sharply, which also has consequences in the used car market.
I’m curious who will still be able and willing to afford a car then.

A suggestion for Teryamy:
1. Take 3 DIN A4 sheets.
2. Draw a four-field grid on each sheet. Labeled as follows:
Advantages short-term | Advantages long-term
Disadvantages short-term | Disadvantages long-term
3. Label the 3 sheets as follows:
Sheet 1: Invest €2000 per month in retirement savings (including house repayment, EFT, etc.).
Sheet 2: Invest €1000 per month in retirement savings (including house repayment, EFT, etc.) and €1000 per month in quality of life.
Sheet 3: Invest €2000 per month in quality of life.
4. Now fill out all 3 sheets with all four fields to the best of your knowledge and conscience, and especially based on feeling. Please be honest here.
4a. It is also important to change perspective to fill out the fields well. "What do I want to look back on at age 90?" and also "What if I become seriously ill at 50?" are often helpful questions to fill out all fields well. We often block out individual fields, but that then causes decision paralysis.
5. Put the sheets in a drawer for one day. Then take them out. Look at them. All arguments that are purely rational (without emotional reaction) often play no role in decision-making. This means especially paying attention to emotional reactions.
5a. However, I would then rationally question exactly those strongly emotional arguments! Figuratively speaking, big decisions should be made with both heart and mind, not heart or mind.
6. Finally, look at which sheet is the most consistent for itself.

(You can create any number of additional sheets with different distributions. The above values should only indicate a tendency.)

I can introduce you to our world.
We will have completed our first financing round in 2 years and then still have a remaining debt of roughly €250k. Currently, we are only repaying our 2 KfW loans with a minimum payment. The rest remains as it is, and we have 2 building savings loans to secure a cheap follow-up financing (which I’m quite glad about now). That was the cheapest model for us back then.

What have we saved up? Zero point zero, nothing. Everything is spent. My husband urgently needed new teeth... bam, €15k gone. Then we wanted a photovoltaic system (without storage). Bam, €18k gone. But it pays off over the years and it’s simply fun to have it. Last year we test drove a Tesla, just for fun. What can I say, we fell in love with it and bought it (financed) the next day. The financing rate was exactly equal to our daughter’s daycare fees, which had stopped 2 months earlier (€409, yes, you can also finance a new car very cheaply). We love the car and regret nothing.
Then my husband has his motorcycle as a hobby. He always puts a few thousand euros into it from time to time. It bothers me, but he loves that damn thing and I’m happy when my third child is happy.
Last year I traveled to New Zealand with my mother. €6k gone.
We blow our money. Much of it goes into the house and property and thus increases its value. But much of it also goes into our enjoyment.
Furniture in our home is mostly used, children’s clothes almost all second hand, toys as well.
My retirement provision is my house and a cute contract with my employer, which will add another €500 at the end. If my money is not enough for the house later, I’ll just have to sell it.
Otherwise, the plan is to have the last €250k of remaining debt paid off by the time I retire (my husband retires 14 years before me).

Conclusion: Stay relaxed. Invest where you think it makes sense, don’t where you see no need. If you want to discuss whether a photovoltaic system or heat pump already makes sense for your house now, you can ask specifically.

If you can live with the old car, then keep driving it. If it becomes uneconomical, then replace it.

Of course, it is not uneconomical. It is extremely economical, since there is no depreciation, no repairs, no comprehensive insurance, no authorized workshop for oil changes & co., no service...

It is purely a comfort issue – can I really “treat” myself to a used car (Octavia, Golf Variant, Focus Turnier... something like that) or do I keep driving the old used car again and again and again, because objectively I do not have an urgent need (i.e. beyond pure comfort aspects).

If it helps you to find your peace, then consider your repayment as rent. A tenant would also not pay the rent several years in advance.

As a tenant, of course, one strives to build up as large a portfolio as possible and thus cover old-age provision and rent (virtually from dividends and distributions). And objectively, more is always better. 120k in the portfolio is better than 100k. 200k in the portfolio is better than 195k, etc...

The automotive sector will be interesting in the coming years anyway. [...] Prices are rising massively, which will also have effects in the used car sector. I’m curious who will still be able and willing to afford a car then.

Especially on the topic of cars, I also see that prices can actually quickly fall into the abyss. Our good Volker Wissing has already suggested imposing all-day driving bans on Saturdays and Sundays. Invest 20-25k now and in a year I am no longer allowed to drive the car for leisure? The value is then practically near zero. And I believe Volker, he would prefer to impose weekend driving bans rather than limit the speeding sales reps to 130 km/h. Basically free rein for the economy and everything in the private sphere is forbidden.

If you knew you could safely drive a car for at least 10 years, okay – 20-25k is well invested. But with a used electric car you don’t know whether the battery lasts 4-5 + 10 years. With a used petrol car you don’t know whether laws or regulations on the federal OR city level will practically make this petrol car unusable and worthless.

"What do I want to look back on at 90 years old?"

I actually don’t care for such questions. I tend to rather think about living in the moment. The question "What do I want to look back on at 90?" is for me the ultimate form of procrastination. And at 90, one doesn’t look back on the bike tour with the kids on 03.07.2026, but rather on the career or the house, but not on the daily routine. At least that’s how I experienced it with an older relative who recently passed away. He repeatedly told stories about his career (senior civil service) or how their multi-family house developed, but not about the daily happiness (or lack thereof) with the children. We actually have more than enough money and a career one might look back on later, but which also demands many sacrifices in daily life, so I don’t really aspire to that.

"What if I get seriously ill at 50?"

Then hopefully the house is paid off so that my family is provided for.

Note 1: Invest €2000 per month in retirement provision (including house repayment, ETFs, etc.).
Note 2: Invest €1000 per month in retirement provision (including house repayment, ETFs, etc.) and €1000 per month in quality of life.
Note 3: Invest €2000 per month in quality of life.

Apart from the car, I really can’t think of anything where I could spend more money. Yes, let’s say a taxi home from the city center for 20-40 euros per month (once or twice) – it really is petty not to do that (at least with our surplus; with the bus I can also get home in 20 minutes of waiting time + 15 minutes ride). I wouldn’t know how to spend 1,000 or even 2,000 euros per month for more quality of life. Meaningless consumption and filling the house full of junk, sure. And I’m not even saying we don’t do that. 200-300 euros per month go for online shopping. There is a lot of nonsense already (!!) that is put away after 0-2 uses. And of course many useful things (diapers, gifts, basic clothing, stationery, new phones every few years).

I can introduce you to our world. We will complete our first financing round in 2 years and then still have an outstanding debt of roughly €250k. Currently, we are only repaying our 2 KfW loans with the minimum payment. The rest remains as is, and we have 2 home savings loans to secure a cheap follow-up financing (I’m quite glad about that now). That was the cheapest model for us back then.

At least you secured the follow-up financing. We don’t have a home savings contract. Interest rates could be 10% or higher in 2031. Historically, they have been that high before.

Last year we test drove a Tesla, just for fun. What can I say, we fell in love and “bought” (financed) it the next day.

It would be interesting to know how high your household net income is. A 45k Tesla new car is, in my opinion, something for households that have at least paid off their first property (without maintenance backlog) and have at least 10k Hamburg net per month or more. For me, a car is a means to an end and actually a bike and the bus also do the job.

Last year I traveled with my mother to New Zealand. €6k gone.

That is, besides medically necessary teeth (so no question anyway), an expense I would also immediately make without batting an eye. I feel completely differently about that than the 45k car, which I rather consider a car for lottery millionaires.

If my money is not enough for the house later, I’ll just have to sell it.

I already discussed that. Young people always say, oh if it’s not enough, I’ll sell it for €800k or a million or whatnot and have a nice life from that. Old people almost always stay in their traditional homes. Including renters in 4-5 room apartments. Including owners in very large houses. People change over time and always react more negatively to changes, especially regarding their own living situation. You can’t emotionally understand that at 35 or 40 because you think differently then. But we all grow old and in old age, we are no different from our parents’ and grandparents’ generation. Of course, there are exceptions, but it is very rare that old people voluntarily move out of the former family home. I could casually say now, I’ll sell it and off to Mallorca. I know my attitude will change with age and when I’m 55 or 60, I’ll be attached to the house and would rather give up vacation, car, and going out than sell the house (I don’t currently think that way, but it is likely that I will change in this direction – because that happens to most people in old age). Therefore, one should also plan otherwise for the other consumption desires.

He kept telling stories about his career (higher civil service) or how things developed with their multifamily house, but not about daily happiness

Maybe because he had nothing else to report. Sad, isn’t it? But it’s not about listing some accomplished things.

Except for the car, I really can’t think of anything where I could really spend more money.

I wouldn’t know how to spend 1,000 or even 2,000 euros a month for more quality of life.

For me, the last time: It’s not about “spending money.” Do what you want with your money. But finally stop (in your life) always thinking about money. Make it so that you feel good. No, not financially. But fundamentally. Quality of life is not achieved by pure spending of money. Even less so if you recognize the struggle in it.
I’ll make two bold suggestions about what it could be about if you (like you) have money in abundance:
1. Both apply for a sabbatical year, exempt the kids from compulsory schooling for one year, and then live and work in New Zealand for 10-12 months or travel through California with a van.
2. Wife or husband goes part-time or quits and lives their dream: open a boutique or a two-wheeled vehicle shop and be really productive. If it takes off, keep going!