Paying "rent" to the partner... how?

I have one more question:
Is it certain that he can manage financing on his own? Or does he get one from the bank as a so-called single? Banks prefer couples (even unmarried), because if one defaults, they can still get something from the other.

He will get financing, but how far it will go, or what you can find for it (or if at all) is the next question. Talks with banks are still ongoing.

Let's keep discussing...
You can clearly see here: whoever has the money has the power. Either you adapt or...?

On the one hand, everyone says, "it's just money/money isn't everything," "if my girlfriend were so petty, I would...", but when I say it's only 100€, I value other things more, then I'm the oppressed/exploited one, he's the macho who enriches himself...
So what? I enrich myself too, says that all the time. It's a win-win situation.

She earns more after all. Of course you can get a loan from the bank as a single. Why does she have to conform? He is giving up having children for her. That’s more like conforming... Therefore, the saying about power is somewhat inappropriate. Neither of them is being forced, not married, no children, etc. They both want it and will find a solution. That it might be seen by the majority as a "weird relationship" or something similar doesn’t matter. I am also curious how it will be resolved and keep my fingers crossed for the OP that they find a good solution for themselves.

Of course, you can get a loan from the bank as a single.

This statement is not quite correct. All factors have to be right. Surely, with some equity and a made-up salary of €2500, you could get financed for €200,000. But if you want €400,000 as a single with this salary, the approval could be negative. It's not about buying in the middle of nowhere here, I think I read something about Stuttgart?!

Therefore, the saying about power is somewhat inappropriate.

We don't want to focus only on the original poster now, but discuss fundamentally. And sometimes you have to put something like that out there. But I actually missed the post about the children.

There is obviously equity available and in the Stuttgart area I also do not assume a hypothetical salary of €2,500. I don’t know if the salary was ever mentioned, only that the original poster has about €500 more per month. Even with a couple earning a total of €2,500, the financing could be rejected. Surely banks prefer to have two people on the contract... We have already discussed the topic "decisions are made by the one who pays." I believe that in a partnership these decisions should be made together. One can/should also be allowed to discuss. The definitive argument "I pay" is very bad and is not good for a relationship. However, arguing on equal footing only works with a similar approach to values, money, and expenses. Even if the money card is always played, I do not see it as power. The partner can always free themselves from the position, has their own income etc.

Hi,

I can tell you how we handled it (even if some find the following peculiar, for us a one-time and clear agreement was the method of choice).

The initial situation was somewhat different, but the status regarding the living situation (1 partner owner, 1 partner not) is identical: My ex-girlfriend and I built in 2013/2014. After 9 months, the separation happened for reasons not relevant here. As a result, she was removed from the land register, I became the sole owner, the bank cooperated and released her from the loan agreement. So, a clean break at that point.

Then I met my current girlfriend and at some point the topic of moving in together came up, along with the same question you have.

We solved this through a corresponding “Agreement on Living and Residential Partnership” with similar rules to a rental contract. (If someone comes up with this: Whether it would be legally binding in a court dispute was not relevant to us - the aim was to clearly regulate certain matters and agree on them.)

The basis for the calculation was, as already suggested here in the thread:
- half of the interest
- half of the additional costs
- half of the maintenance reserve
- (not yet mentioned) a contribution for the further development of the garden of the new building (since acquisition costs borne by me, but jointly designed and used)

Agreement on the Formation of a Living and Residential Partnership
Between
xxx
And
YYY
1. XXX is the owner of the property XXX.
2. YYY moves in as a life partner with effect from 01.12.2015, so that both parties jointly occupy the property and YYY has the right to co-use the land including all structural facilities.
3. As a contribution to the maintenance costs for the property, YYY pays a flat rate of 440€ / month to XXX. The amount is due on the 1st of each month. A change in the cost contribution is only possible by mutual agreement. Gas and electricity costs are not included in this amount and are shared equally by both parties as part of the joint household management. The amount is based on the billing from the energy suppliers. XXX remains the contractual partner with the energy suppliers. Also excluded are non-property-related living costs (e.g. internet, television, insurances except building insurance, GEZ)
4. Necessary repair and renovation work as well as value-increasing measures / new acquisitions are borne solely by XXX as owner.
5. In the event of a separation of the life partners, YYY is granted a right of residence (not obligation) for 3 months.
6. In the event of the death of XXX, YYY is granted a right of residence (no obligation) for 6 months with the agreed cost contribution to arrange the further procedure with the heirs or to move to a new accommodation.
7. If XXX contemplates a sale, YYY must be informed in good time, but at least 3 months before the sale date. In the event of dissolution of the life partnership, point 5 applies.
8. YYY expressly has the right to terminate this agreement without notice and to dissolve the living and residential partnership. The dissolution becomes effective immediately.

Hi,

I can tell you how we arranged it (even if some find the following strange, for us a one-time and clear agreement was the best option)

The initial situation was somewhat different, but the living situation (1 partner owner, 1 partner not) is the same: My ex-girlfriend and I built in 2013/2014. After 9 months, due to reasons not relevant here, we separated. As a result, she was removed from the land register, I became the sole owner, the bank cooperated and released her from the loan agreement. So, a clean break at that point.

Then I met my current girlfriend and at some point the topic of moving in together came up and with it the same question you have.

We solved it through a corresponding "Agreement on Residential and Life Partnership" with similar regulation points as a rental contract. (If someone brings this up: Whether this would be legally binding in a court dispute was not relevant to us - it was about clearly regulating certain things and being in agreement.)

The basis of the calculation was, as already suggested here in the thread:
- half of the interest
- half of the ancillary costs
- half of the maintenance reserve
- (not mentioned before) a contribution for further garden development of the new building (since acquisition costs were borne by me, but the design and use are shared)

Agreement on the Formation of a Residential and Life Partnership
Between
xxx
and
YYY
1. XXX is the owner of the property xxx.
2. YYY moves in there as life partner effective 01.12.2015, so that both parties jointly occupy the property and has the right to use the land including all structural facilities.
3. As a contribution to the maintenance costs of the property, YYY pays a flat rate of €440 per month to XXX. The amount is due on the first of each month. A change in the cost contribution is only possible by mutual agreement. Gas and electricity costs are not included in this amount and are borne by both parties equally as part of the joint household management. The amount is based on the billing from the energy suppliers. The contracting party with the energy suppliers remains XXX. Also not included are non-property-related living costs (e.g. internet, television, insurances except building insurance, broadcasting fees)
4. Necessary repair and renovation works as well as measures to increase value / new acquisitions are solely borne by XXX as owner.
5. In the event of a separation of the life partners, YYY is entitled to a right of residence (not obligation) for 3 months.
6. In the event of the death of XXX, YYY is entitled to a right of residence (no obligation) of 6 months at the agreed cost contribution in order to arrange further proceedings with the heirs or to move to a new accommodation.
7. If XXX considers a sale, YYY must be informed early, but at least 3 months before the sale date. In the case of dissolution of the life partnership, point 5) applies.
8. YYY expressly has the right to terminate this agreement without notice and dissolve the residential and life partnership. The dissolution is effective immediately.

I am still missing the clause: 4 times intercourse per week = credit of €75, every additional time adds €25 on top