Planning house construction and considering the desire for children

  • Erstellt am 2019-03-11 15:44:21

Steffen80

2019-03-14 07:29:48
  • #1
I think having children at 40 is also very late and too late. I can understand both people who have children at a young age, before they build their careers, and those who have children in their 30s. Both have advantages and disadvantages. In our case, nature decided that we had children relatively late; otherwise, it would have been in our mid-20s. That would have been the perfect age for me. The nerves and one's own health are simply different there than in the mid to late 30s. With our third child, I will be 38, and that is my personal limit. Certain things in life should also be achieved before the first child; without a steady income and a stable career, it's better to avoid having children altogether.
 

Basti2709

2019-03-14 08:25:16
  • #2
When we started building, I was 25, at moving in 26... the eldest was 6 years old (my wife’s son from a previous relationship) and the little one was 3 months old. The first parental leave was used only for the construction.

Two children's rooms were planned and built... now the youngest was added in 2017. I am still thinking about how we can best handle this and whether a renovation might make sense…

For me, family planning was complete at 27 years old. Because of the children and the move to my workplace, away from my "home village" and (about 50 km) my whole life has completely changed. Almost all my buddies are still childless, some still live with their mom... almost every weekend they go to parties until the morning…

Now the children are slowly all at a point where my wife and I can go out again. Just last Saturday we were "child-free" for the first time (as far as I can remember)... we went shopping, ate out and afterward went to the cocktail bar. At some point I looked at my watch completely sleepy... it was just before 10:00 pm…
 

HilfeHilfe

2019-03-14 08:58:22
  • #3
Well, especially since many people still ask for help from Grandma and Grandpa. If I were 45, would it then be Grandma, Grandpa, or great-grandma and great-grandpa?
 

haydee

2019-03-14 09:22:23
  • #4
It has to fit. I would have been a disaster as a mother in my mid-20s. Now with a 4 in front, I can definitely imagine having a second child. I am much calmer, more balanced than before, sleepless nights don’t bother me. Work, house, child—it works. I don’t feel overwhelmed or overburdened. It is what it is, it comes as it comes. However, my child still grows up somewhat 80s style without helicopter parents.
 

Müllerin

2019-03-14 09:23:05
  • #5
I met my husband only at 26.
Child then came at 32.

The only thing that is tough for children if mom is, for example, 45, is that she is 65 when they start university and dad is often even older – and then the child might already have to deal with care, etc....
 

Winniefred

2019-03-14 11:06:17
  • #6
We bought and renovated with two small children. It was definitely exhausting, but ultimately doable. They were 1 and 3 years old at the time of purchase and 2 and 4 when we moved in. Usually, only one person could be on the construction site while the other took care of the children. Sometimes the grandparents also stepped in. In return, the children now have the garden as long as they are still little. For both the children and the dog, I simply find it unbeatable to just have to open the door. We don’t regret it, even though we would have had more time and money for this project without children. On the other hand, we wouldn’t have bought a house without the children either.
 
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