Is building a house possible with our salaries? Your opinions

40% equity, who manages to save that in their young years nowadays? We’re talking about over 200k here

No one is saying he has to have achieved it by 29.

before that we earned less and regularly went on vacation etc., and both did a part-time study alongside work,

You see for yourself: your priorities in life were not exactly on building a house.
A lavish lifestyle and a high-quality house simply do not go together with an average income. At some point, the switch in your mind has to be flipped, start saving, and then you can see further in a few years.

What kind of person are you? The name says it all...

I am a realist. And what the OP intends is financial suicide. Nothing can sugarcoat that. And even if he waits another 3 years, it doesn't change much. It's still only 60k equity.

But as I said, some bank will go along with it

That's why saving 10k after a few months is actually pretty good, at least that's what I thought

And I mentioned at the beginning, the plan is to build within the next 1-3 years. So saving a bit should work

Why? The 10,000 will be gone again after the wedding, right?! What you will save in 1-3 years are exactly the incidental costs like kitchen and furniture... there is hardly anything left for the financing.

What you can and also have to do: look at the market for plots of land. Then you'll see where you will end up. This search can already take several years without capital. A developer variant costs much more than it is offered for.
You can calculate that yourselves where you will end up financially.

may be a rough and tough guy who just flew in, but he is right about what he says.
And hesitancy rarely helps in this forum anyway.

You can read it: you don't have to sugarcoat or sweet-talk anything to the forum. Nor do you have to explain why you have nothing here.
You have to explain that to yourself yourself!

You should always have 10,000 as an emergency fund in the checking account - that is not savings!

Your plan with the wedding + trip, children in 2 years, and house construction in 1-3 years unfortunately won't work out like that.

You should at least have enough cash to cover things like [Grunderwerbsteuer], notary, land charge registration, kitchen, furniture, lamps, etc. + a 10k-20k€ buffer in the account.

If you want to have any chance at all, then significantly reduce the size of the house (~130m²), build simply, and say goodbye to things like, for example, a children's bathroom right away.

You also need to decide what to do with the 10k€. For a classic wedding in white with family and friends, the money is either enough for everything around the wedding, or the celebration itself, or the honeymoon. If you are very frugal, then for two out of three.

I still do not see any large-scale construction in Wetterau. In 3 years, construction costs will also be 700k instead of 600.

Wow, that seems a bit too much for me.

I don't think the bank is that wrong.
€450K as a budget (not purchase price) might be doable at the moment.
Definitely not more, especially not with family planning ahead.

Buy yourselves a nice condominium that is initially sufficient for a family. Save and pay off as much as you can and then see what your finances and the market say in 5-10 years.