How to afford building a house and buying land today?

The consideration of being unattached is completely legitimate and important in the decision. Living one’s life is important. Money is not. The commitment to the bank is not slavish. No one will be forced to keep the house. If I want to emigrate, the cottage will simply be sold, the bank will get its money, and a new chapter will begin.

In a rental apartment you also pay monthly, but there you have a three-month notice period and can then find something cheaper (or nothing at all and just emigrate ). Try telling that to the bank that still wants 300,000 from you.

This has nothing to do with "messing up", it’s simply common sense telling you that having to pay 1,800 euros monthly for the next 30 years is not great for a self-determined life.

Of course, this is not directed against home builders / homeowners, but generally at full financers who have to calculate a hundred times whether it could really work.

We also earn about 5,000 euros a month and still don’t want to borrow money from the bank for a house. I’d rather pay 1,000 euros rent and enjoy a good life.

I don’t want to open a pro and con topic about renting/buying here now. And honestly, I wouldn’t want to be finished with the repayment at retirement age. The prerequisite for our house construction was healthy financing and despite the high amount, that is guaranteed thanks to equity. I am of the opinion that due to cheap external capital some new-build enthusiasts take risks they wouldn’t have even thought of before.

But rent is not a cure-all. If you will, my installment is fixed for the next 20 years, or rather will even decrease after 10 and 15 years due to repaid loans. With rent, it’s the other way around; here the landlord can increase the rent as he pleases (within certain limits). Even moving to another apartment without deterioration always results in a rent increase.

Also, saving and buying in old age only helps to a limited extent, because today’s 100k€ cash assets/equity will be worth how much in 20 years?

EDIT: @TE what answer do you expect with your confused initial post? Neither the size of the house nor the desired standard is specified. We practically know nothing about your building project! You know the stated premises here in the forum regarding new builds. Subtract your own work from the often mentioned 2000€/sqm living space plus ancillary construction costs and whatnot and you already have an approximate sum.

Am I willing to live in rented accommodation at the bank for decades (for most 25 to 35 years) and therefore give up freedom, vacation,

...Except for freedom (everyone defines that differently)...

in which one has the urge to live and travel, try new things, pursue hobbies

...it’s simply a question of priorities. I prefer to see my children playing in my garden, live and enjoy 351 days more beautifully than many do in rented housing, and still go on vacation the other 14 days... maybe not every year to the Bahamas or to watch penguins on a tourist research ship. But again, everyone sets priorities differently. That’s completely legitimate. But that person then also doesn’t want to buy a house.

to live rented at the bank

tied to someone who wants between 1200 and 1800 euros monthly, depending. And always. Every month until retirement.

and to give up the good feeling of owing nothing to anyone?

That is German Angst.
In my opinion

That is German Angst.
In my opinion

So according to you, everyone who only spends the money they have already earned is "afraid" and "chicken"?
Well then, by your logic it must be very brave and heroic to go into debt with others for something you actually cannot afford.

As I said, owning a house is very nice and generally enhances life, but nowadays many really think they can get "cheap" money from the bank and finance 100 percent. But what is missing in interest is compensated and probably even exceeded by rising prices of building materials and craftsmen.

And no one can tell me that with a large loan you actually make a profit because of low interest rates and inflation.
A small plus in a big minus still does not make a profit.

The consideration of being unbound is completely legitimate and important in the decision. Living one’s life is important. Money is not. The commitment to the bank is not slavish. No one will be forced to keep their house. If I want to emigrate, the cottage will simply be sold, the bank gets its money, and a new chapter begins.

Unfortunately, in reality, you can’t just sell your house like that. It’s like a new car: once you’ve driven a kilometer, it’s only worth half because it’s used. A bit exaggerated, but it’s similar with a house. The incidental purchase costs are definitely gone. And the bank will probably also want its prepayment penalty. My thought about a (overpriced) house was once: how many years would I have to amortize before I could sell it again without being left with residual debt. It would have been more than 10 years... such thoughts gave me stomach aches, regardless of the installment. As fate would have it, I have now bought a house below value. It was still expensive for my financial situation and the installment is high, but I sleep peacefully.

They're only numbers- numbers on paper. Once you understand them, it's easy to make them behave.

Am I willing to live renting from the bank for decades (for most 25 to 35 years) and therefore give up freedom, vacation, and the good feeling of owing nothing to anyone?

Aha. So what is a typical life course here? Lived with parents until 18, then rented until the end of studies and onwards until 35, saving equity capital. In total, 35 years lived well in dependency and rent, but renting "from the bank until retirement" is out of the question? Strange...

Finally, a provocative statement: The greatest restrictions on freedom are unfortunately one’s own children.

Finally, a provocative statement: The greatest restrictions in terms of freedom are unfortunately one's own children.

True (at least for at least 10 years), but also the source of greatest joy!!!