Price negotiation single-family house

Here is an example from us from last year:

REH - advertised for 325k in a bidding process.
The viewing took place without an agent. The appointment was set, we and several other interested parties had confirmed by email, but the agent did not properly acknowledge this and therefore informed the owners that the viewing was canceled. However, they were very surprised when suddenly interested parties showed up at the door.

This type of viewing had the advantage that we could speak openly with the owners. From the conversation, the following emerged:
- The bidding process was suggested by the agent. The owners had no idea what exactly it entailed.
- There is no financial pressure whatsoever. The house is being sold because it is too big. A move to an inherited, smaller house is planned.
- It is important to them that the future owners fit in with the neighborhood (9 other units), as they are partly friends with the neighbors.

Afterwards, we thought about it for a day and then decided to leave a message in the owners’ mailbox. I can no longer recall the exact content. The gist, however, was that we had great interest and a few questions. Direct contact details were not known and the agent probably would have tried to prevent this.

We looked at the house again and then communicated in a conversation that, unfortunately, the purchase price was a bit too high for us. Our offer was 280k. As expected, this was too low for the owners. We then agreed on 300k. After a few days of consideration, the owners gave us the go-ahead by phone. We then submitted a corresponding offer to the agent and shortly afterwards received the official approval.

I would never risk anything over 30k, that's a ridiculous amount if it's a great house.

We also offered 30k below the asking price 7 years ago, even though we had fallen in love with the house. At first, we were outbid, but the other buyers quickly withdrew and then we got the deal. We still congratulate ourselves daily that we acted quickly back then. At that time, we believed the house was not without alternatives. Shortly thereafter, another quite decent one in a slightly worse location came on the market and then NOTHING else.
Apparently, we were also much more likeable to the sellers than the other interested parties, but a 30k difference was simply too much.

Think about what you would do if you don’t get the house. Is building new in the area realistic? Or calculate how much longer you would have to pay back at the asking price.

Seven years ago, we also offered 30k below the asking price, even though we had fallen in love with the house. At first, we were outbid, but the other buyers quickly withdrew, and then we got the deal. We still congratulate ourselves daily that we acted quickly back then. At that time, we believed that the house was not the only option. Shortly afterwards, another quite decent property in a slightly worse location came on the market, and then NOTHING else.
Apparently, we were also much more likeable to the sellers than the other interested parties, but a difference of 30k was simply too much.

Think about what you would do if you don't get the house. Is building new realistic in town? Or calculate how much longer you would have to pay back at the asking price.

Well, at the asking price, even more equity would be necessary, or we would have to increase our installment by a few hundred euros, pay even more interest, and end up with an even larger residual debt. But that also means we would have to give up a lot, and we could offer less to the children. It's already the case that even at our price, we will have around 100k remaining at the end, and then we will already be 60. We hope that we can get rid of that with special repayments.
It's all not easy; at the moment, I can't think of anything else—I want the house so much.
However, we feel comfortable in our rental apartment and could theoretically continue searching and saving for another five years.
But it will also be really bitter for us to have to give up this house if we don't reach an agreement.
Thank you all very much for the advice. If it works out, I will let you know.
Best regards

we can also offer less to the children.

That is relative. After all, you offer a great home with a garden.

It is already the case that even with our price we end up with around 100k, and then we are already 60.

Just imagine you are tenants and have to pay a cold rent of maybe 1,000€. That is the alternative to the "high" debt of 100k at age 60.

But we feel comfortable in our rental apartment and could theoretically still search and save for another 5 years.

That is a great starting point. You don't have a lot of pressure. Sometimes it suddenly works out when you are not desperately searching.

As soon as it goes through a broker and then also through a bidding process, the price tends to go up rather than down. We also experienced this at the beginning of last year. A house from the 70s, vacant for a few years, completely in need of renovation, was offered through a broker in a bidding process. A minimum bid was set, which was already relatively high. The house was then sold for over 50k more than the minimum bid.
However, if it is from a private seller and the seller cares not only about the money but also about who gets the house, it looks different again. At the same time as the house mentioned above, we also viewed another one, a private sale. Despite offering 15k less than the asking price, we actually got it. Of course, we don’t know if we were the highest bidders.
In any case, we were just lucky to find such a house without a broker and then also get the contract.

As soon as it goes through a broker and even more so in a bidding process, the price tends to go up rather than down.
We also had this experience at the beginning of last year. A house from the 70s, empty for a few years, completely in need of renovation, offered by the broker in a bidding process. A minimum bid was set, which was already relatively high. The house was then sold for over 50k more than the minimum bid.

However, if it is from a private seller and the seller values not only the money but also who gets the house, it looks different again. At the same time as the house mentioned above, we also looked at another one, sold privately. We then got that one, despite offering 15k less than the asking price. Of course, we don’t know if we were the highest bidders.
In any case, we were just lucky to find such a house without a broker and even get the contract.

Here in the area, so the location even better than that house, a house was offered without a broker in a bidding process. The minimum price was set at 450k, the house was large, a nice garden from the 60s, but the inside was ugly, unrenovated, and cluttered. Back then they held mass viewings despite Corona and probably thought they would get more offers, in the end, the house was online for 6 months, then it was gone and three months later back online with a broker for 420 ^^ and even for that, it stayed on the market for 3-4 months despite very high demand for houses in that location. I think in the end someone bought it for 380.
I find that selling is not that easy when the house is very old or the price is significantly higher than most in the region are willing to pay. Our price expectation is the same as most; only a few can pay the offered price, but for that, the house has to be on the internet and marketed. Which is certainly associated with a lot of stress.