How are we supposed to agree :(

  • Erstellt am 2014-02-02 20:44:12

HilfeHilfe

2014-02-03 08:29:43
  • #1
Honestly, I would go crazy after a year too!

How is it otherwise with life decisions like: vacation, buying a car, having children? Is there also such intense discussion about those? If so, I’m not surprised about the house story. You don’t need to be a psych doc for that either.
 

ypg

2014-02-03 08:52:13
  • #2


If you have a "problem" plot, you should let a professional handle it anyway!
Then there are no disputes either, when an architect conjures up a professionally thought-out design!

Where exactly is the problem? U-value? Color? Dimensions? Parapet? Much or little? 1- or 2-leaf? Muntins? Darkening?
 

Simon71

2014-02-03 09:25:02
  • #3
My wife and I also have completely different tastes. She is more the modern minimalist type, large windows, simple furnishings. I find that totally uncomfortable! I like it rustic with lots of wood and a few flourishes. The house we found is somewhere in between – and we’re trying to combine our tastes. In the living room, for example, there aren’t too many pieces of furniture and decorations, but there is a cozy stove and a sprawling couch. We both had to compromise, but it worked out quite well. Just keep working on yourselves, you’ll manage it!
 

milkie

2014-02-03 10:22:43
  • #4
Yes, it is/was about the window dimensions. But we have now probably found an interim solution - of course also for the sake of the partner. We are willing to compromise, it is just very exhausting. And it takes a bit longer. And no, otherwise we get along great and have long been living in a rental building that, however, exactly represents everything no one wants...

A professional is also involved in the planning, but it took 4 drafts until both of us were satisfied. That of course also takes time. There are certainly couples who shout hooray at the first draft, we are not among them. But surely there are more couples who need longer. I can’t imagine that we are a "rarity," especially since the architect said that sometimes it can be 10 different drafts before the design is finalized.

The plot is flat but due to the groundwater level, it is to be built without a basement. So replacement rooms had to be added here from the start. Also, the plot is narrow but long, the street is on the south side, and through the desired positioning of the building, two gardens are created, one on the south side and one on the north side. Both need to be connected to the living spaces. These were our requirements and our architect has now managed it as well. Well, it took some time but now both are satisfied. Maybe another architect would have found the solution faster... who knows.

Well, but if one wants a lot of window surfaces and light bands, and the other rather the classic tall two-leaf windows, then it just gets difficult again. But as I said, we have also found a compromise here. Once the architect has redone everything, we can also upload the plans.
 

perlenmann

2014-02-03 10:49:50
  • #5
The great "art" in compromises is to make the other believe afterwards that it was their idea :)
We had, for example, a different opinion regarding the hinge side of a door. Today my wife says it was her idea ;)

But better to spend a little more time planning now than to be annoyed about something for decades later
 

ypg

2014-02-03 11:17:36
  • #6


Well... but this is also a classic case... mention finally in post #16 what it's actually about, but somehow still not quite clearly. With this pace and openness (I just assume that the communication in the partnership goes the same way ;)) it could still take years with you.

Tip: Define the problem immediately – also with the partner – and provide examples, facts and preferably directly an alternative or option... then the problem-solving usually goes Razzifatzi :D

What surprises me however: if Achi is already on it, windows must be planned too?! And yet we are stuck here again and don't know about the problem. Because: there are norms after all that should be observed -> light incidence.
 

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