Building land in the middle of nowhere with the house prices?!

Well, you have to want something like that and unfortunately you don’t sound convinced. For us, that would not be an option at all. Commuting 50 km is a horror scenario. We enjoy vacationing in the countryside but afterwards always know why we wouldn’t want to live like that. Getting into the car for every little thing. Forgot milk? Lost another 30 minutes because you first have to get going by car. Everything is far away. With children, you’re constantly playing the parent taxi, I see that with friends who have 2-3 kids. Of course, it also has advantages. It’s quieter, more scenic, you often have more space. Purely a matter of taste in my eyes, we are clearly pro-city. I don’t want to drive an hour for a specialist, 20 minutes to the pharmacy, 30 minutes to the child’s dance class, 30 minutes to the other one’s karate. My grandmother had 50 km to the nearest cardiologist in the countryside. 45 minutes to the nearest highway on-ramp, nearest train station 7 km away and only a tiny shuttle train there, next proper train station 30 km… unthinkable for me in everyday life.

Thank you very much for your previous opinions and impressions.

You have already addressed the most important aspects, and we share exactly those thoughts and they are what keep us busy. As written above, we simply missed the optimal time for various reasons – as life often plays out – and now we are desperately looking for something affordable, but there simply is nothing left. With the current interest rates, we simply cannot take out hundreds of thousands of euros.

We really liked the plot of land and it is a new development area in the town with many young families. Of course, we are no longer in our early 30s, but I believe one can integrate well there. Whether one is accepted in the town otherwise is hard for me to assess. After all, with children you have the most contact with other families who have not all moved in recently.

We are also fortunate that we don’t have to go to the office every day. My wife and I would organize it so that I go to the office three times and she goes twice, so that one of us would always be working from home. I personally also spent some time professionally in another city and commuted by train. You could work well there and thus use the travel time meaningfully. I see it similarly with the 40 minutes on the regional train; at least you can read something, etc. I don’t imagine commuting to be that bad. Possibly a car would then suffice. Driving the route by car is really no fun – we’re talking about 1:20 hours without/little traffic... During rush hour it’s certainly an additional 15-30 minutes – therefore the train is the only option.

I see the train connection in 7 minutes on foot as the big advantage of the plot. But 40 minutes should of course not be underestimated. You’ve pointed it out correctly, quickly grabbing a doner or going to the Vietnamese around the corner – that is definitely no longer possible! Can you do without that in the long run? Difficult if you don’t try ;)

The uncertainty definitely plays a role for me. I grew up in the city and the children already experience the advantages of the city now. I also have the feeling that we were scrutinized quite closely during the 2-3 visits to the place. You can tell quite quickly that we are "outsiders." But in the new development area we actually had a very nice conversation right away. You also agree with me that it could become difficult. Especially if for some reason one would have to sell the property in 2-3 years.

Maybe we should wait it out a bit longer, but a three-room apartment is really getting tight with two children! Especially since we are already working 2-3 days from home! That’s where we also miss a garden and space...

If you are already doing Flexoffice, have you asked your employers if there is a possibility to work full remote? Then I think it would look quite different.

Before making a purchase decision, I would also try the train commute route at the corresponding time. 40 minutes standing without a seat on the Regiobahn would not be something I personally would want either.

Personally, I actually find commuting by train rather relaxing, as long as you don’t have to change trains too often. I can handle 1 hour of train travel much better than 1 hour of driving. The commute helps me mentally separate private life and work. But I also know that not everyone sees it that way and then gets even more stressed... But a 1+ hour commute really hurts, especially if it’s the same for both partners. With partial home office, I find it more conceivable. I once had a 1+ hour commute for about a year as a temporary situation (I’d have to check the exact time, but like ~50 minutes by train plus getting to/from the station), also really 5 days a week, but at the time I was single and childless. For a transitional period, it was okay, but I was glad when I didn’t have to do it anymore.

Are the 40 minutes by train to your "work city" then also the next big center, or is there a smaller town or something closer? Aka where I grew up, it was also about ~45 minutes by regional train to the next big city. But there were also other smaller towns in the surrounding area. Of course, it varies widely depending on the region. But for us, it was such that there was basically nothing directly in town, but still most things you need for everyday life were reachable within ~10-20 minutes by car. As a teenager, I was often annoyed by that, but you find your options (bike, carpooling, coordinating with the one bus per day that runs).

That sounds a bit different now than in the first post. I would also start with the employer on this topic and see if you can get a bit more home office. In theory, commuting by train with a direct connection is certainly better than by car. But at the relevant times, the trains are usually packed, and standing room isn't fun either. I would also definitely recommend looking at the connection and, if possible, asking someone from the commuters how reliable the connections are, especially in winter.

Please do not underestimate the disadvantages of working "full remote" as well. You have to be that type of person for it...

I spent almost a whole year at home in the home office during the Corona pandemic and was very relieved when I could go out to the customer again. You need quite a bit of discipline, and above all your partner must understand that you also have to work 8 or 9 hours daily in the home office and not unload the dishwasher, hang up laundry, vacuum, or dig the garden...

Unfortunately, you also quickly run the risk of being sidelined if you don't have an irreplaceable job... hallway gossip, coffee chats, fooling around—all of that passes you by... and MS Teams can't replace that either. I would miss that. If I didn't have field service, I would sit in the office at least twice a week.