Building land in the middle of nowhere with the house prices?!

I now have a simple commute of about 45km instead of the previous 2km by bike. However, only once a week; the other 4 days I work from home. Every day would definitely be too much for me. It's also important not only to consider the pure kilometers but also the necessary time during rush hour. With over an hour, you are definitely above the threshold for normally resilient people. I am always skeptical when city people want to move out to the countryside just because of cheap building land. Go through your daily routine and think about what you would have to change. In rural areas, you either become more home-oriented or you are only at home to sleep. For the latter, you don't need a complete house. Also remember that the construction time is significantly more stressful when the site is so far away.

This problem eventually resolved itself. Children don't stay 3 and 6 forever. And the days when we had to pick up our eldest from [KiTa], I can count them on one hand; it happened once in 5 years.

We recently moved completely to the countryside, demographically somewhat like where you are (a village of 2000 souls with an elementary school), but with the significant difference that we both work fully remotely. If we ever didn’t want to do that anymore, there would be jobs within a 30-minute commute. Any further would be too much for me personally. 40 minutes is already my pain threshold.

Previously, we also moved out of Oldenburg (Oldb) to the countryside due to price reasons. At that time, we worked in OL and had commutes of 25-35 minutes to our offices. In Oldenburg, like where you are, building land was no longer affordable.
In the end, we never really had to commute properly because then Corona came. We actually liked the community we moved to, although it was hard to really connect there during Corona. Some of the locals were also a bit right of center, and my husband is a foreigner, which didn’t exactly make things easier. In the village, you are initially "the outsiders," but I guess that also depends on the village and its clientele, you can’t generalize from one village to another. Where we are building now, I already feel more integrated than in the old place, and we haven’t even moved in yet. Maybe the Pfälzer are just a different breed than the Lower Saxons, no idea.

Long story short: I wouldn’t put up with an hour commute. That already is a strong reduction in quality of life. Isn’t there anything near you that’s a bit closer to the jobs but still affordable? Something in the middle, with about 20-30 minutes travel time?

I wouldn’t do it either. We moved from the city to the suburbs. Accordingly, it was still expensive. Further out stood the affordable dream houses, one of which we almost took – then a sleepless night thinking about commuting, having to have two cars, getting into the car for everything. We ended up choosing a semi-detached house instead of a single-family home, but with a great location and still a notably large garden, at least for the proximity to the city. We now almost only drive into the city to work; we have settled in well here in the town, and due to its size, there are many offers for leisure, school, shopping, etc. We would do it the same way again. During/after Corona, we had a phase where we most wanted to live as remotely “outside” as possible and seriously reconsidered. But just the thought of commuting to work, and the lack of offers for the children – at 3 and 6 they are not that demanding yet, but later you might want to offer more than the one soccer club that exists in the village. When we now drive through the villages, we still see beautiful, great houses, but we wouldn’t want to live there permanently. Weigh carefully what is important to you in everyday life. Eventually, the euphoria about the great house is gone and then you live there every day. I would choose the place to live first, then the house, not the other way around.

Apart from the affordable plot, there is nothing in favor of this place of residence for you. You both need more than 1 hour per trip to work, and that only under optimal conditions. What happens if you want or have to change employers? Are there alternatives nearby, or will the commute be even longer? For me personally, it wouldn't be an option because I also want to have some life or participate in my children's lives as long as they still allow it. On top of that, there is the risk for you that you have never lived in a rural area before, and a sale certainly won't be that easy.

the missing offers for the child

The offers for children are not missing in rural areas, they are just different. Construction trailers or self-built huts instead of youth centers, rural youth parties instead of discos, the freedom to play on the street or roam through the surrounding forests. For standard sports, there are local clubs, and with the youth band of the Hintertupfingen music association, the children don’t get bored either. You don’t have to go to playgrounds where 15-year-olds have left shards from the drinking party the night before. I wouldn’t worry about missing opportunities for children and teenagers in rural areas. More about the parents who have gotten used to quickly eating out when they’re too lazy to cook and having 15 restaurants to choose from, going to the supermarket quickly at 9 p.m., and so on.