Overall, I do not like the draft, but I consider it salvageable with a very, very rough adjustment.
First of all, it is good to appreciate the natural terrain in the draft. However, it is also about making it positively perceptible through a successful zoning. Unfortunately, this has not been achieved by placing the utility room and the office.
Additionally, you are basically relying on two building volumes, which is also a good idea; however, this should be made more perceptible through planned sightlines, as mentioned above regarding the terrain, if possible also from the kitchen.
Without knowing the legal and other requirements, I consider an "L" shape with a setback in the other building volume, so that it almost forms a "T," together with a different or additional staircase, more suitable.