Regarding the calculation: I just finished it.
You can simply have a calculation prepared by the architect. It requires little effort - but is relatively expensive.
That’s why I decided against it.
This is how I proceeded:
First question: What needs / should be done? Accordingly, list the individual trades such as roof, heating, painting, flooring, etc. in Excel.
Second question: How much does it cost? Then read up online on the topics, made estimates of the costs to the best of my knowledge and conscience, and then extrapolated the whole thing based on quantities / areas (you surely have the plans, e.g. parquet 100 € / 100 sqm = 10,000 € etc.).
For the biggest items like the roof, I obtained 1-2 quotes each: You won’t get around this and it also makes sense: Not just for the bank, but for self-protection. The bank explicitly required this from me, really only for the 2-3 major trades. Just call the craftsmen and tell them to make rough price offers based on the plans / info. With some, you will wait forever, but with many (at least here) you get something within 2-3 weeks. Or meet them on site.
Then I added a flat buffer of 15,000 € and left 1,000 € - 2,000 € margin in the individual items and went with the offers and my Excel to a friendly architect, who critically reviewed it again and gave me a stamp with a signature on the calculation. If you don’t know one, call someone and ask if they will review the calculation for half a day’s fee. You will find someone.