House construction financing - What is possible and realistic for us?

How far is it to the nearest school? Is there a larger town within 10 km?

Yes, we already had a conversation with the bank, that was about 2 years ago! However, it was nothing concrete and without the calculation that part of the salary is lost due to children! Therefore no longer current!

In terms of size, it could be easily divided, legally no idea!

We have not yet requested demolition and new construction, that is coming up soon! But a friend works at the city and he said that it would not be a problem!

At a distance of 4 km there is a town with 6000 inhabitants and at a distance of 7 km a town with 45000 inhabitants!

First of all: It’s not about there being no shop or infrastructure! We drive by car every day anyway. I rather have a problem with the fact that 80% of the people living there are elderly (over 50)! And I fear that the place will eventually “die out.”

I grew up there and really had a great childhood/youth there! But at that time there were also peers in the direct neighborhood! And since there will be no new development area there in the foreseeable future, I see things very negatively in that regard!

Since we can’t afford a building plot with new construction and the situation with houses for sale is currently very bad, it will probably come down to the village!

Don’t you think that exactly this attitude is the reason for the dying out of such small villages? Because all the young people push into the cities and thus drive the prices up. But it’s your decision and I don’t want to influence you there.

Regarding financing:
I think about 1100 euros as a rate is realistic, since you also have to bridge the time without/with half a second income.

Yes, we already had a conversation with the bank, that was about 2 years ago! But it was nothing concrete and without the calculation that part of the salary is lost because of children! So it's no longer current!

In terms of size, it could be easily divided, legally no idea!

We haven’t inquired about demolition and new construction yet, that is coming up soon! But an acquaintance works at the city and he said it wouldn’t be a problem!

There is a town with 6,000 inhabitants 4 km away and a town with 45,000 inhabitants 7 km away!

Sounds like a good location. The children can reach school by bike

I wouldn’t worry about depreciation or sales problems either, since your plot has to be a real one in order to build a single-family house on it. The floor area ratio etc. determines the size.

And regarding age... wow... 50-year-olds are at an age where they should still manage 17 years. And life shows that some over-60s are fitter than 30-year-olds
Just change your attitude towards age. We’ll see each other again later

The numbers also add up – by the way, banks calculate based on the actual... that a salary might possibly cease due to children, you have to be able to calculate yourself.

So I think your property doesn’t sound too bad in terms of location. Does a school bus run? Are there decent bike paths available? Believe me, you don’t always want to play taxi for the kids.

Otherwise:
Check if your parents’ property can be divided and built on.
If yes, then you can start more detailed financing inquiries.
Clarify with your parents how the property will be transferred to you. I believe it can’t be done at zero euros.
Then start being eager that the child is there when the construction starts (ideally). Because pregnant, your wife can only be used on the construction site to a limited extent. And if you want to do some work yourselves, you will need her labor. Once the child is there, grandma can babysit (that’s what we did). Or you wait until you are in the house. But that can still take 2-3 years.

By the way, do not exclude a kindergarten from the cost planning too rigorously. If you get one like we did, you’ll make three crosses when the child is with a daycare provider at 10 months. You simply cannot keep every child at home until school age. You shouldn’t, for the child’s sake anyway. From 3 years on, every child belongs in a group to learn how to interact in a group.
Ü3 is by far not as expensive as U3, but costs still occur, as well as traveling to a daycare, and at the times the daycare decides.
That means the child has to be there by 9 a.m. at the latest and depending on the hours booked, picked up again by 4 or 5 p.m. The daycare doesn’t care if that is inconvenient for you because you work shifts.

Clarify with the parents how the property should be transferred to you. I believe it can't be done for 0 €.

You have a tax exemption of 400,000 € from parents to child in the case of a gift. We have a very similar situation and also had it checked by a tax advisor, so it should be fine. The only question is whether your wife should also be entered in the land register?