House construction project with terrible credit rating and almost zero equity capital :-)

In a thread like this, you really wish for moderation.

Nope.

I don't want to sugarcoat anything here. But just to state

You are right there. I mean, I think this "well, that's just how it is in the forum, don't make such a fuss" attitude always makes me react sensitively, sorry.

That the project as such is completely out of the question is also beyond doubt for me. The question is always how you write something like that. It's a question of attitude and respect, nothing more and nothing less.

If you scroll back, leaving out one or two commentators, you can read that the real unpleasantness this is about was already anticipated by the OP. The entire initial thread is full of clichés and harsh words

Just because you are anonymous here doesn’t mean you have to be stupid.

The question is: what is stupidity? Is it the harsh true words or the softly packaged lie? We are neither psychologists nor the most socially competent here; we are all just the average construction folks reflecting what the OP anticipated.

It was once said that exactly this anonymity is the advantage, to speak frankly because the personal environment does not truthfully spare you.

It’s not about the content of the statement.

?

But if someone really wants personal help,

I don't believe anyone here really wants personal help.

then you have to ask follow-up questions. Like: how did this situation come about, what do the children requiring care need, what type of care dependency, etc.

I have been here now for 6 years. In this forum. And precisely these questions the OP does not want to hear. Until now, almost all have become cranky or completely disappeared when it got too personal here. When something is asked or questioned, the OP often fears that their identity will be exposed. Because without an anonymous forum, they would not ask their question at all.

and yes knows about their style... I don’t like incomplete sentences either. That is WhatsApp language and disrespectful.

I also find it negligent that you will soon have 5 children and live with them (including 2 foster children) in such a confined space. Won't you be checked by the youth welfare office or similar authorities?

What Hans says about Hansi says more about Hans than about Hansi.

and honestly, that is my personal opinion. If you have 4 partially needy children, a low work income which is supplemented by care allowance, and a small living space, and then get pregnant again and expect your 5th child? Sorry, I have no social understanding for that at all. And yes, I have to pay for that in the solidarity community. So now you may bash my opinion again. Yes, it is not social!!

Always kicking someone when they're down, that's easy enough....

Thank you for the fitting words. Very well summarized objectively (including me).

The question is: what is nonsense? Is it the harsh true words or the softly packaged lie? We are not psychologists here nor the most socially competent, we are all the average construction people here, reflecting what the OP anticipated.

Then show me now the one who has lied here and advised the OP to build in his current situation. Please. Maybe you will then realize yourself that here without exception no one has said anything different on the subject matter than: impossible. Maybe you will also notice that some manage this statement without belittling the OP (I claim, by the way, that the average person manages this completely well), and it is always the same ones who apparently are not able to do so.