Construction project and building permit feasible?

We like, for example, the Sh 142 from Scanhouse.

You are welcome to research TVöD. In 2021, I am in level 4 + intensive allowance + shift allowance monthly. (+tax-free night allowances!!) I received €2150 in the BV in 2016! Level advancement remains unaffected by the intensive allowance. And there is an additional approximately €100 care allowance per child every month, I believe.

The care allowance nicely compensates somewhat for the daycare costs, but it disappears later. Is shift work still compatible with your wife plus all the children (daycare hours, etc.)?

The childcare allowance kindly compensates the daycare costs a bit, but it will later be discontinued. Is shift work still compatible with your wife plus all the children (daycare times, etc.)?

Yes, because I only work full-time when my wife is at home with EG. After that, she goes back to full-time because the salary is significantly higher, and I have calculated with 25 hours. I have NOT included the childcare allowance. I took the salary from back then. IT WILL be more.
Besides, I'm not studying for fun. I just can't calculate with that. But if I find something, I won't start shifts and more money.

We like the Sh 142 from Scanhouse, for example.

Neither floor plan A nor B has enough usable space for 5 people living there permanently. The room downstairs is more to be seen as a guest room. I know you currently see 4 bedrooms and think "that fits," but without a plot of land, you don't even know where the front door will be located. Building according to the development plan already restricts a lot and can change everything you have thought of in advance. Experienced it myself. At least the hallway is big enough to fit a stroller. EDIT: Requirement regarding a second shower on the ground floor not fulfilled!

The rooms with the sloping ceilings really feel small. You would have to stand inside to see how cramped it really is. A shower for five people is no longer really appropriate. No idea if you could fit another one downstairs.

The desire for homeownership seems to me to be excessive. Apparently, you would sacrifice a lot for it. What about your wife? Does she see it the same way?

The time for searching for land and planning is a good trial period. Usually, it lasts about 2 years or even more. During this time, you can let your equity grow significantly. It’s best to start today.

Building for 5 people is no small matter. But nowhere in the law does it say that 2 children cannot grow up in one room. You could also let all 3 sleep together and use the other room as a playroom or similar. You could also simply say that 2 children are enough.

With the house you like, you are already well above your 130m² and it lacks a full bedroom / children’s room. You can already see where this is heading. 150m² would be the minimum for five without a basement. Given the financial situation, I see that as nearly utopian.