Who first built a smaller house and extended it?

Got none of that? Yes! A bank account with CAPITAL. I agree that this can backfire with the interest in 5 years.
So to me, this sounds like a small child who thinks they have to have everything!

A house for 200k is doable, but ONLY the house. Maybe with painter and flooring.
My house cost 55% of the total costs!

I stick to my point, first make clear to yourself what is financially feasible and then start planning a house

Sorry, but what exactly do I want that much? I don't think that can be compared to a small child.

I have neither high demands on the house nor any other luxury problems. We just want to invest our money sensibly in our own house. I find it somewhat shocking that with €2000.00 net, which !!is left over!!, you can’t even afford a small house if you depend on credit.

When I think that I could afford a super chic apartment in Hamburg or Munich for €2000.00 warm, I find it really bad not even to be able to put a small house here "in the village."

And the region would also be Bavaria. The LaBo doesn’t work, I just used their calculator. We earn way too much together to be eligible.

Of course, you can afford a little house for €2000. Only the sum of €200,000 is too small. Roughly estimated, they say you can afford a loan of €100,000 with €500 per month. For you, that would be €300,000–400,000. With that, a little house could be built. But you also want to have children. Then the income decreases and, with the planned 3 children, probably permanently as well. Everything just doesn’t work out.

Why is there still no equity? With €2000 per month, you haven’t even saved for 1 year? (To be fair, you of course have to offset the rent here)

Of course you can afford a little house for 2000€. But the amount of 200k€ is too low. Roughly speaking, you can afford a loan of 100,000€ with a monthly payment of 500€. That would be 300-400k€ for you. That would be enough to build a little house. But you also want to have children. Then the income decreases and with three planned children probably permanently. Everything just doesn’t work out.

Why is there no equity yet? At 2000€ per month, you haven’t even saved for one year? (To be fair, of course you have to offset the rent here)

There is no equity because I am 24 and my girlfriend is 22. I have been in my job for one year (first job before university). I know that we are really still too young to build. That’s what it ultimately comes down to. Since we are young, we could of course set a longer loan term. That has the disadvantage that you remain "in debt" forever. I assume that my salary will increase and we will certainly be able to make special repayments if agreed with the bank.

That’s true. Everything just doesn’t work. We have learned/seen that now. That you have to plan for a measly house around 300-400k is of course quite intense.

But honestly, who really has 30% equity at the start of construction? How much did you have and what did the house end up costing (completely with everything)?

A couple of friends of ours are also currently building and they are planning with 320k including furnishings, but without the land because they got it as a gift from mom.

Why is that nonsense? Even my bank advisor agrees with me!

Since you currently don’t pay rent, you can set aside €2000 monthly...

If you buy a house and take out €300k, then €1000 easily goes towards interest and other "house-related costs" (insurance, taxes, etc.), so you can only pay down the principal or save €1000 monthly...

In 5 years, you will easily have a "head start" of €60-70k if you consistently set aside that €2000...

The interest rates would have to get extremely bad for that not to make sense... If you were paying €700 cold rent now, then you could consider the whole thing...
but in this case, your bank advisor is really talking nonsense if he thinks it would be better to build now with 0 equity instead of saving €120k+ in 5 years....

The fact that your bank advisor confirms that, what does that mean? He earns! No matter what happens with you.

And what did he say, how much money can you put in?

Who has 30%? Someone who saves ;) and does not want to build a house one year after the first money at 24.
Imagine, my parents had an interest rate of 8% and they managed it.

If you manage that, that's nice. It just all sounds a bit naive what you are writing. By the way, I wasn’t different at the start of the construction planning :)

If you were paying 700€ cold rent now, then one could consider the whole thing...

That's exactly what I mean! Of course, we have 2000.00 € left now because we don't have to pay for an apartment. We will move into an apartment this year if the house doesn't work out.

Then we are at about 500 - 700 € warm rent (cheap apartment, 50m² is enough). The money is then gone, and from saving 2000 €, only 1300 remain. After five years, that is "only" 78,000 € equity.

We haven't clarified yet how much loan we can really afford right now. I really have to check, but as it sounds, it won't be enough for 300-400k that we will need :-)

Actually, I am already convinced that we have to wait another five years, that I want to make good progress in my job, and then plan again with more salary and solid equity.