Retirement provision and children's education in financing?

Our financing is settled until the little one hypothetically starts university. Who knows what will happen by then. Vocational training, for example in craftsmanship, university studies perhaps from the child's bedroom – digitalization should really progress now. What belongs to the first vocational training will be paid for. A loft in Munich is not included, nor is an unlimited study period. Luxury should be earned independently. The children will not become spoiled and dependent because of this. That is probably due to 18 years of full service during which the functioning of a broom is not taught. Support for parents. Until the social welfare office asks the children to pay, the child/children must already earn quite decently and not that much monthly support comes out of it. Whether one wants to let it come to that is another matter. However, it should always be possible to obtain a few things for personal needs for one or two people.

I would at least nudge them to find a side job. But it would be great if it fits their field.

Yes, if they want a bit of luxury, they have to earn it... I did that throughout my studies, from the second year also in my field as a student assistant. That educates and clarifies in which direction one wants to go. My children don't have to study. But since it is the most expensive education, at least if you support them like above, I have to plan it so it works. If then one stays at home and doesn't need a shared apartment room or starts a dual study program or an apprenticeship - no problem. I'll manage to spend the money anyway. PS: The 13-year-old is producing ink from beetroot this year at Youth Research, before that she investigated what happens if the Earth spins backwards or which gases besides helium make balloons float. Study wish: Physics and then particle acceleration. I probably don't have to force her to study...

The last pages are all about support from the children during their studies, as it feels.
I have not read a single post about the support from the parents. The media often mentions that we have more and more retirees close to the poverty line.
According to this forum, it’s not the parents of homeowners :oops:.
My wife and I are only children with migration backgrounds. Our parents only came to Germany around the age of 35-40. Although they have worked here for all those years, their pensions will not be much higher than Hartz IV (especially considering the rent).
For this reason, we are now pushing hard on repaying the house so that we are done by the time our parents retire.
From then on, the repayment rate goes to the parents...

You ended a previously heated discussion with the description of your extraordinary family situation and the special approach you take to it, well done :D:D:D
Seriously: I think that’s great and exactly corresponds to my idea of family. Regardless of what the legislator stipulates, a family should also function without regulations, which means that the person who needs help gets it from the family. I see this obligation in every direction within the family. I read your account here for the first time; it should inspire the other participants too. Thanks!
Sometimes I also read the word "sacrifice" in this context. In my opinion, I find that inappropriate in the framework of supporting a young person. When parents give their children more money than they are legally "required" to, they do it voluntarily, and with such a gift, both sides always have joy—the giver as much as the receiver. Therefore, it does not constitute a sacrifice.
When I felt better again later, I gave each of my two children a larger sum so they could repay their student loans. I did that gladly and completely voluntarily; it did not feel like a sacrifice even though I could have bought something super nice with that money. For me, it was also a gift to be able to do that.
The word "sacrifice" always sounds a bit painful to me, and I do not want my children to feel (and it is not so) that I suffer because of my gift to them. By the way, I also sometimes read "sacrifice" regarding lower equipment in housebuilding, and I find that equally inappropriate.
That’s how I felt when my own parents gave me something. If they had to "sacrifice," i.e., suffered a loss, I wouldn’t have enjoyed it. But I never had that feeling, nor was it conveyed to me.

I say this because I have repeatedly heard from students that they have to finish their studies as quickly as possible or decide against some things because their parents would prefer it that way. They themselves would have done it differently, but in the end, the parents pay for their apartment, car, and "sacrifice" so much. Apparently, this was conveyed to those young people at least, and it makes my hair stand on end. I do not imagine a free, young adult like that.
This certainly does not happen universally but apparently quite frequently. In this respect, more money can certainly make life easier for young people, but it can also become a shackle for them. I find it indispensable that they make their future decisions completely alone and free from such influences. It is their life.
This is often confused with the idea that the older generation is too harsh on young people; for the reasons stated above, I do not see it that way—in my opinion, it rather promotes their free development.

I am of the opinion that one should also consider who decided on what. I or rather we consciously chose the children. They could not choose to be born. Therefore, I see us as parents as responsible. As such, they will receive all the support they need in life, provided it is possible and desired. On the other hand, I see it as our duty to provide in such a way that the children do not have to support us. Again, it was our decision to have children, not theirs. Regardless of that, I maintain a good relationship with my parents and they will also be supported if necessary. However, we will not provide care without mutual consent. That can quickly destroy families. Seen that often enough with friends.

As I am just rereading the thread title carefully, I am, by the way, of the absolute unshakable opinion that I do not need to do anything for the direct retirement provision of my children...