Is the construction project feasible or are we taking on more than we can handle?

For a couple around 30 without children, the bank will anyway factor in a pregnancy.

No, that's called discrimination. And indeed, "the bank" in such mass business is just a factory where assembly line business is processed mechanically. There are no longer people sitting who decide on each loan individually or analyze numbers. The majority comes anyway via platforms and goes directly into the bank's black box, gets a green light, and is thus approved. Direct inquiries on site still take the detour of data input into the machine; the rest runs analogously to the platform business. Only and exclusively if the light is not green does a human intervene and check manually.

We will wait and see how her career progresses for now. The discussions are scheduled to take place in January. She already switched to the company group a few years ago. The place of work and years of employment remain the same. We are not married, so we cannot manipulate the tax class. Therefore, the parental allowance will be around €1600. Not much more is possible anyway due to the maximum rate.

Without marriage, it will not work financially for you. A marriage brings you several hundred euros monthly (tax advantage + free co-insurance). I will never understand why there are people who build a house and have a child together, but then refuse to get married. Your other situation is uncertain. Maybe you will get a loan from a regional development bank, then it could work out. This way, the installment could possibly be controlled to just over 1000 euros per month for the first years due to little or no repayment, and it could also be attempted with a single earner. I do not see a usual bank financing working for you.

No, that is called discrimination. And in fact, "the bank" in such mass business is just a factory where assembly line business is processed mechanically. There are no longer people sitting there deciding on each loan individually or analyzing numbers. The majority comes anyway through platforms and goes straight into the bank's black box, gets a green light and is thus approved. Direct requests on site still take the detour of data entry into the machine, the rest runs analog to the platform business. Only and exclusively when the light is not green does a person intervene and check manually.

Yes, the machine would currently certainly give them a monthly loan of just under 2k (which would be needed as a standard). But should they want that? I haven't read everything, but the woman seems very likely to be unemployed after unemployment and the man probably earns at most 2.5 to 3k net. With that, such a loan cannot be serviced. It should be taken into account that there might be additional support such as child allowance, housing benefit, citizen's income, which can be used fully or at least partially temporarily for interest payments. I would rather go the route of a development bank and not rashly conclude something online and regret it afterward. The couple should actually fit perfectly into the framework here. And again, the most important advice: get married! It gives you massive financial leeway. Every euro counts for you.

We had to fill out such a self-disclosure form for our financing ( , closing 2022), which among other things included questions like these:

Wow, do they still ask such things? That is legally not permissible or the questions do not have to be answered truthfully – concerning private life like child planning or similar.

But should they want that? I haven’t read everything, but the woman is most likely unemployed after unemployment and the man is probably earning at most 2.5 to 3k net. With that, such a loan cannot be serviced. Although it should be considered that there might be further support like child allowance, housing benefit, citizen’s income, which can be used fully or partially at least temporarily for interest payments.

I would rather go the route of a development bank and not rashly conclude something online and regret it afterwards. This couple should actually fit perfectly into the scheme here.

I have only just read the last pages of the thread. The partner will not become unemployed but is with an employer with an uncertain future.
The interesting question is what he actually earns net. That would be the decisive factor for me – even though I am rather pro-financing here in the forum. And if that doesn’t fit, then it means waiting. The motto "Et hätt noch immer jot jejange" should not be applied here.