130 sqm detached house or townhouse with my budget of 220k

I have corrected my information once again....

Ok. Then you should, no you must ignore the woman's income. In that case, one could consider a condominium or an existing property. I wouldn't do it. Better: increase income, complete child planning, and save significantly more equity. There are enough people who still build/buy in their mid-30s or 40s. I myself am in my mid-30s.

Just don't let banks talk you into anything :)

Regards, Steffen

PS: Alternatively, play the lottery or rob a bank :p

There is no one in this forum who is interested in seeing young forum participants on TV in "Wir haben Bau-Ruine" on Sunday afternoon at 5:00 PM.

Or at Peter :D

There are enough people who still build/buy in their mid-30s or 40s. I myself am in my mid-30s.

Just don’t let banks talk you into anything :)

Regards, Steffen

PS: Alternatively play the lottery or rob a bank :p

I am 50. My wife is 48.
The neighbors opposite in the new building: 61 and 58.

Each first single-family house, previously rented (or other circumstances).

Thorsten
(who strongly advises against bank robberies and, as a physicist, considers the probability of winning the lottery as possible but low......different topic....)

Yes, exactly because of the desire to have children

Maybe as a banker I can put the cart before the horse for you: If you assume you can afford €800 per month for a construction financing loan installment and the bank agrees—based on their household calculation for you—then, based on the current interest rates, they should provide you with approximately €192,000 in construction financing.

Calculation: €800/month times 12 = €9,600/year you could pay in installments. Assuming you have medium creditworthiness and would have to pay 2.5% interest AND want/should repay 2.5% (so you finish before retirement), the €9,600 corresponds to an annuity (interest + repayment) of 5%.
It follows by rule of three: 9,600 divided by 5 times 100 = €192,000.

Honestly, any amount above that for construction financing seems too risky given your income situation OR the repayment would take forever, which also makes no sense. At the latest by the end of the first fixed interest period you would have problems, because then a high sum would still be outstanding and the interest rates will probably be significantly higher than today (today’s interest rate level is historically an absolute exception, construction financing interest rates of 5% and more are normal in the long term!).

With your income and the above-mentioned maximum(!) amount, I would look for a nice condominium or an affordable existing property that can cost around €150,000 - €160,000. Because if you add the unfortunately additional purchase incidental costs on top of the €150,000/€160,000 (here in NRW that would be 6.5% property transfer tax, 1.5% notary, 0.5% land registry office and possibly 3.57% broker, so together about 12%) you arrive at around €170,000 - €180,000. That way you would still have a buffer including your own capital for renovations, moving, furniture, etc.
If you are more security-oriented, you can reduce the purchase price even further—it will definitely be a condominium then, which is still great for many families with three or four members (it was for us for years) and in return increase the repayment, then you will be finished quickly due to the currently good interest rates and with the quickly repaid condominium you will have a better equity base when you go towards the house project in your mid/late thirties.

Thank you again. You are talking about mid/late 30s here. Do you mean that in 5-10 years I will have paid off a [ETW]? That is of course a different approach.

Best regards