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Thank you all for the many responses! Of course, I am still uncertain about building myself. As stated in the last post, two of my colleagues almost built their houses themselves as well. What they did not do (but still helped with) was the roof, the windows, and the electrical work (but I am not sure about that now). One took about 11 months for his 200 m2 house, the other took 9 months for 170 m2 until they could move in. Both are married with children. The second one is currently calculating his next house and planning to build it himself again. So, it is possible. As I wrote at the beginning, my father has, in a way, also built at least one house and would do it again. However, it is true that you should not plan anything else during that time and that it is hard work. I have also worked hard in my life and often cursed during the renovation... but my wife was never to blame. You should be able to separate that. Now the only question remaining is whether the costs from my architect are correct...??? I will receive a more detailed cost breakdown from him this week.

One took about 11 months for his 200 m2 house, the other 9 months for 170 m2 until they could move in. Both married with children.

Then I wonder why our house building company took so long, when a craftsman with friends can manage it alone like that? tz.

Then I wonder why our house building company took so long if a craftsman with friends can manage it alone just like that? tsk.

That is certainly a legitimate question.
Why don’t we all just build our own houses if it hardly takes any longer? No, seriously. It may be that they moved in after 9 and 11 months, but ask them how long it really took until they were completely finished building. Because I find it unrealistic to have really built a completely finished new building inside and out in that time, at least with full-time work and a normal amount of vacation days, not to mention if you have a wife and children whom you might also want to see from time to time. And I see the partnership problem as the least of it (even though building a house is always a test for the relationship, even if you don’t build yourself), but try explaining to small children why daddy isn’t there again to read a bedtime story / to go to grandma and grandpa’s house etc. (the list could go on indefinitely).
In the end, everyone has to decide for themselves what to do. If you want to build your house largely by yourself, fine. But please don’t imagine it’s as easy as you might think now. Because it will cost you a lot of strength, time, and nerves. And you (and also your father) should consider that it’s a whole different level of challenge to build an entire single-family house completely on your own than to build an extension.

I moved in already in February
But still not finished.

Hello,
we also did a lot ourselves. At that time, my husband still had a relatively low-hour job and also had 8 weeks off from house building due to job changes and vacation. We moved after a good year, but not everything is finished yet. The garden is a mud desert, instead of a paved entrance area there is first an old carpet, outside is not plastered yet. Inside everything is almost finished, even if a baseboard is still missing or the railing is not painted yet. But I can live well with that for now.
We saved the most by doing the shell construction ourselves. However, we have a good friend who was always there for us and also lent a hand and is a professional.
We always had the material price offered for trades that we trusted ourselves or friends/family who are professionals, and then from different companies with execution. You quickly notice what is actually worthwhile. Some companies also agree, for example, to come with one less craftsman if you act as a laborer yourself.
What should not be underestimated is that you can still quickly change something. We, for example, quickly moved two non-load-bearing walls.
Fortunately, there have been no physical injuries so far. However, I would never build again. And if I had known what was coming to us, only ready to move in. My husband is already planning his next building project... Our garage is too small for all the tools that have accumulated and our fleet of vehicles, so now he has to build an additional large garage/barn...
Oh yes, what helped us a lot is that someone in our family has been working as a building materials representative for years and therefore knows a lot of people, since you always need this and that quickly.