Hi,
the VDW840+ can also be installed afterwards, it's just that the preparation effort is higher... No, it is not elastic, but there is a product from ecoStones, which is a solid joint with a "Green" binder, a natural binder made from some plant extract instead of plastic resin. This is reactivated by moisture (e.g. rain), adheres again and again to the paving stones (when the side adhesion breaks off, it is practically recreated) and cracks etc. fill up by themselves... I haven't personally processed it yet, but it is supposed to be great when installed, and I find it pioneering for the future because it contains no chemicals...
Drainage should be done as planned with a drainage channel or point drain (e.g. yard drain), I simply let it run from the terrace onto the lawn at home and that's fine... But even if you only fill the joints with sand, you should do this, because with heavy rain, water passes through the sand joint just as little, moreover, dry sand takes its time to absorb the water downward, with heavy rain it rather washes off the surface away from the sand... A joint made of grit is indeed more ideal but not feasible with narrow joints