Land purchase and house construction too risky in the current situation?

I would prefer the project children. They only really need their own space once they are 5 and older. We became parents in our mid to late 30s and I envy everyone who started a few years earlier. I also found managing a second baby alongside a toddler and a job at 38 much more exhausting than at 34.

That guarantees a more relaxed floor installation…

… but you don’t build a basement with Senioren_Fremdhilfe_. You can accept help, but you shouldn’t overstrain it. My husband himself is just over 60, very fit, but I wouldn’t send him to build a house, if you know what I mean. You should rather be able to offer your husband support. If you know what I mean ;)

That’s good. But even they have to pay their craftsmen and issue invoices. Such things should still be realistically calculated so that you don’t suddenly have to reckon with a €10,000 position instead of a €0 position.

I see that too, therefore #4

Yes, definitely I see myself obligated there as well. We have already changed quite a bit at our current house and I like to help out – even if I usually do the "helper tasks" like passing material and taking away debris ;)

Regarding surplus during parental leave: That is actually our reason why €2,500 is our maximum rate. It is affordable for us even during parental leave, especially because, as you also write, you can at least temporarily reduce or suspend retirement provision. With the current (unfortunately probably too conservative) calculation it is just about feasible, but probably not with significantly higher costs or significantly higher interest rates.

I would prefer the children project. They only really need their own space once they are 5 or older. We became parents in our mid and late 30s, and I envy everyone who started a few years earlier. I also found managing the second baby alongside a toddler and a job at 38 extremely more exhausting than at 34.

On the other hand, doing it yourself and having small children simply isn't the ideal combination. And even if you do little yourself... building a house just consumes a lot of mental capacity that then is missing for the child.

I would prefer the children project. They only really need their own space when they are 5 or older. We became parents in our mid and late 30s, and I envy everyone who started a few years earlier. I also found managing a second baby alongside a toddler and a job at 38 extremely more exhausting than at 34.

On the other hand, doing a lot yourself and having small children is simply not the ideal combination. And even if you do little yourself... building a house just consumes a lot of mental capacity that is then missing for the child

Yes, here we are also constantly thinking about what the right order is – if one can even speak of "right." If we start the building project now, we would definitely postpone planning for children; otherwise, it cannot be reconciled with the necessary own work.

With children, many things simply become more complicated. It’s not just "get up, quickly have breakfast, and go," but it drags on. Even everyday life without a construction site now requires so much more planning and time. The trip to the daycare before work takes time that is missing in the evening. All this without the construction site yet. Small children need constant care, unless they are sleeping. If both parents want to work, care must be ensured, and not just from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m. Children also usually go to bed a little earlier; if you want to see the child in the evening, there’s not much energy left for personal tasks after work. Even just checking the construction site is more demanding because small children have a talent for finding leftover nails, etc., and putting them in their mouths. A walkthrough with the electrician was also a bit exhausting because someone at 14 months already wanted to climb the ladder to the upper floor (and would have been able to get up there!). If I could choose, I would definitely tackle the topic of house building before having a child.

I would actually prefer the children project. They only really need their own space when they are 5 and older. We became parents in our mid to late 30s and I envy everyone who started a few years earlier. I also found handling the second baby alongside a toddler and a job at 38 extremely more exhausting than at 34.

But then, in addition to job and small children, there is also the house construction. That could be more difficult to manage. So maybe better to do job and house first, and when the nest is ready and both are professionally established, then the children. :) When the little children are here, starting to look for a plot and building/buying a house ... does bring a bit of unrest into family life. The plot is now being offered.