Is buying a house worth it for me?

The listing of expenses is already questionable on its own, as much is still missing! Clothing, food, leisure, GEZ, reserves, etc. But this is what happens when you try to estimate your expenses without a household budget! So calculate more precisely again. 100€ daycare for 2 children or is that per child? What about meal money, art money, excursion money, etc.

Also, you cannot compare 800€ cold rent with a rate of 1200€. At least 1/3 of that will be interest and you have higher monthly additional costs with a single-family house. On average, you can estimate around 400€ flat rate, so you are already at +600€ between warm rent and warm single-family house.

How long has your wife been self-employed? is basically right that self-employment is evaluated differently for a loan than an employment relationship.

Maybe I overlooked it, but are the 360k€ already including the land? Do you already have a buildable plot, if not then you might not manage to get a building permit within the next 15 months. That would also make the Baukindergeld moot, because according to the current status the funding ends on 31.12.2020.

The listing of expenses is already questionable by itself, as much is still missing! Clothing, food, leisure, GEZ, savings, etc.
But that’s what happens when you try to estimate your expenses without a household budget! So calculate again more precisely. 100€ daycare for 2 children or is that per child? What about meal money, art money, excursion money, etc.

I see it the same way and also agree with ’s posts.

One thing is what you earn. Here I don’t see over 4000, but under 4000. Child benefit should be left aside for now, self-employment and side jobs are rather uncertain. At least for the bank. They calculate many things differently. And for yourself, you should also calculate cautiously with these incomes, as they are not stable.

Expenses: so much is missing here—living expenses, drugstore items, daily necessities, pocket money, gifts, medication, etc.
If you guess that the 200€ loan is for the car, a renewed savings plan for the next car must be calculated. You don’t get that for free. Or else it’s for a new financing.
Additional house costs would be about 400€ for the calculation.

Then to the purchase costs:
Is it a used house? Then the costs are manageable. Renovations can possibly be done little by little using EL (supplementary benefits).
Is it a new build? Then on top of the 360,000, quite a few things come up, which push the sum to over 400,000 + x.
The money from mother-in-law covers the ancillary purchase costs, but not the kitchen. Flooring in EL costs material.

Homework: Break down account transactions of the last six months as honestly as possible. There will be nothing to excuse. Whoever bought decorations or ate out every month will do so again later. Although it may be less, decoration stuff of 100€ becomes 70€; when eating out, instead of 60€, 45€ will be spent. The child will still be taken to McDonald’s. You have raised yourself and the children; there is no 180-degree turn.

No one has to become a homeowner

It is actually a very suitable time right now (beginning of the month and Christmas season are approaching) to start a household budget book. Please enter ALL expenses there, including those for food, eating out, cosmetics, snacks, pocket money, etc. - I assume you will be somewhat shocked then. I consider it very dangerous to take out a loan now and think that you can easily cut back afterward and everything will be fine. Restrict yourselves NOW as if you were paying a mortgage, utilities, reserves, insurance for the house – without cheating.

Is this a new build?

That was a question to the OP, to

Phew, I wasn't in the forum this weekend and now I have to catch up here, thank you all. So, it shouldn't be a new build but a used house. My wife has had this income for about 5 years, but she started working again after her parental leave in August, and my additional income of €420 has been around for almost 15 years. The household account book is a good idea; I wanted to do it anyway, and that will be my next step. I am a person who gets something in my head and I have exactly the goal to buy a house, so I would almost say that we can already restrict our standard of living a bit with a house, after all, you can spend wonderful summer days here in the garden and the children have plenty of space to play.