We moved in the right order. We first lived together in Gelsenkirchen, super central, daycare right across the street, DM reachable in 2 minutes on foot, the trusted döner guy below us and enough discount stores on the left and right to ensure a successful hunt. My husband commuted 45 minutes to work every day, I 20-30 minutes. In the end, we built where the plot of land that we liked and could afford was located. That was basically right next to my workplace (phew, lucky). It was important for us that no one has to bite the bullet and have the long commute (my husband now even only drives 30 minutes). Additionally, the following factors came into play: - Daycare and primary school within 15 minutes by bike - Shopping opportunities within walking distance - Hobby options within biking distance (I have no desire to chauffeur my kids until they are 18) In the end, I think for you it will be the case that primarily your wife will pick up the children from daycare and school, right? Therefore, I would favor her somewhat in terms of workplace location if the childcare is conveniently located.