Construction financing, 2 borrowers

No children are planned for the time being. If there are any, then there will be maintenance payments etc., but that's a different story now. Who says that the woman stays at home full-time and takes care of the children? From a financial point of view, it makes sense for my girlfriend to stay [zH] for the time being, but we will see when the time comes... When children come into play, the time the person staying [zH] would be credited as if the payments had continued. Increase/decrease in the value of the property would be credited in equal parts according to the payments made towards the property. I know, this is very complicated. However, my girlfriend herself also wants everything to be precisely regulated... But where does one start and where does one stop?

Does she then have a right to fully reclaim the already paid 25% towards the financing? (in my opinion, she would have effectively lived in the property rent-free during that time) Or does the bank automatically withhold a proportional part equivalent to the local customary rent,

From how it sounds with you, you would probably be better off having separate arrangements: You buy the house and take out the loan and she pays you monthly rent. If children then come, this rent can be suspended. Done.

The way it sounds with you, you would probably be better off with separate arrangements: You buy the house and take out the loan, and she pays you a monthly rent. If children come, this rent can be suspended. Done.

I agree

I can understand wanting to safeguard yourself just in case. But here it seems to be about every single amount, which to me would already be too much of well-intentioned "protection."

In my opinion, it would be better and also feasible. My personal suggestion was initially to set 100% on me, and in the notarial deed to stipulate that once 50% of the loan can be taken out in a few years, it can be taken out and then registered equally in the land register. There is only the word "Miete" ([Kostenpauschale]), which should be paid until then, and if the relationship still exists, of course, it will be credited, in the way. If the relationship fails after X years (which I certainly do not hope!!!), she wants this [Kostenpauschale] back. Which I find not correct. What is your opinion on this?

In your position, I would leave everything as it is. No trust, only self-protection, that's all I can read here. Counting working hours for raising children....

If I were you, I would leave everything as it is. No trust, I only read self-protection here. Counting working hours for raising children....

What does that have to do with trust? If you don’t clarify such matters beforehand, you end up with a much bigger problem afterwards. I think it’s good to openly discuss possible scenarios. If the worst-case scenario doesn’t happen, everything is fine.