Buying a house from grandma or waiting for the inheritance?

Hello dear forum,
maybe someone wants to read about my situation and can help get the question marks out of my head.

I am 33 years old and have been living since I was 27 on a 5000m2 property with 2 houses, one of which has an extension (a semi-detached house, so to speak).
My grandma lives in one house, who bought the property with my late grandpa about 50 years ago, and my parents have lived in the other house since 2001. They sold their house in the next village and bought this one because my grandma was overwhelmed being alone on this large property.
I moved there when I was 11. Moved out at 19 and moved into the semi-detached house (80m2 living space) at 27 and have been paying rent since then. I was told that it would eventually be "mine." Of course, that was not true and I was too naive… yes, downright stupid.

My mom has two siblings. She fully paid off the brother (inheritance) and only partially the sister.
Apparently, she owns 2/3 or grandma owns 1/2. Now it is so that the sister is not a good person. She broke off with the brother, sometimes with the mother, and now with the sister for 4 years. Whole relationships escalate over small things.

My husband and I would like to have property so that we also have something for our child in the future and as an investment for us.
I am still a complete novice in this matter. In spring, we asked my grandma and my parents what they think about us buying the semi-detached house (part or the whole house). We expressed interest and would like to buy it BEFORE my grandma dies. Of course, better communicated than written here now. My parents are enthusiastic, and my grandma (who the purchase concerns) is not happy at all.
She didn’t say "no," but wanted to ask her son. Which she hasn’t done for a year now. Yesterday my dad asked if she had talked to him, and she said, "No, I’m only going to live at most 2 more years anyway."
She is afraid.
Afraid that we are pushing her out
Afraid of probably everything related to it.

She wants us to settle it after her death.
I’m afraid that will go wrong because my aunt is so terrible.

It’s not about taking something away from others, and I fully accept my grandma’s decision. But we are ALL novices here and I only have some half-knowledge.
I think a professional should look at it. Look at who owns what here. What the aunt is entitled to. What has to be paid if inherited or if sold beforehand.

How do I best approach this so that we all know what to expect? Because this property is not designed to be sold individually. My parents’ heating supplies my grandma’s house with heat. All the electrical cables are somehow connected, and, and, and...

Of course it can be done somehow, but all of this has caused all parties involved stomach aches for years, and it’s no coincidence that everyone somehow has existential fears.

-Who is the right contact person to unravel who owns what?
-Who can tell us what to expect if we buy this through inheritance or if it makes financial sense to clarify and buy it BEFORE?

Do you have any ideas about this and can maybe help me?

We all love my grandma. We live together in four generations peacefully and mostly happily. These problems are ignored and avoided by everyone… and yet everyone somehow has fear and anxiety because of it. I think it should not happen that my grandma dies and her daughter/my mom only then worries about how she can keep the house and property without her sister (who has a rich husband and therefore does not work) calling lawyers and taking whatever she can and more. As already mentioned, this woman has always gone through life like this and loves destruction.

Hello, welcome to the forum.

I can't quite follow yet how the ownership statuses are now and who can still inherit or not.

My mom has two siblings. She has fully paid out the brother (inheritance) and only partially the sister.
Apparently, 2/3 belongs to her or 1/2 to grandma.

So there is 1 plot of land on which two houses stand, right? The most important question is: Who holds which ownership shares in the land register? These are initially the people who own everything (simplified).

You say the brother was paid out (inheritance). Was it about the grandfather's inheritance, or has the grandmother's inheritance already been paid out and he can no longer inherit anything?

I think a big problem is that two houses stand on one plot of land. I would work towards having the plot divided accordingly. Otherwise, you will de facto not be able to buy anything.

Of course, you can ask a notary. As an expert, they explain everything in great detail for the appropriate fee. Everything that can be clarified before the inheritance should be clarified, provided that grandma wants that. After that, it gets complicated. Due to disputes over the inheritance, this often ends up with a court-enforced forced sale. That is the worst option in every respect.

If grandma doesn't want that, I would leave it all behind and look for property elsewhere to be independent from all that stuff. If then an inheritance comes, that's good. If not, no big deal.

I still can’t quite follow how the current ownership situation is and who can still inherit what or not.


So there is 1 piece of land with two houses on it, right? The most important question is: Who is listed in the land register with which ownership shares? Those are initially the people who own everything (simply put).

You say the brother was paid out (heir). Was it about the grandfather’s inheritance, or has the grandmother’s inheritance already been paid out and he can’t inherit anything more?

Thank you very much for answering!
Yes, exactly, there are 2 houses (one of which is a semi-detached house) on a 5000m2 plot. Unfortunately, it is structured in such a way that it is difficult to divide the land.

The brother received his entire share and does not want anything more.

My mother can’t tell me whether she owns 2/3 or 1/2.
In any case, one house belongs to her and the other to my grandmother + her house has the annex where I live as a tenant.

Apparently, a lot has been done somehow underhandedly and there is "it must be alright."
"We are family after all." As I already wrote, the houses are even connected by heating. Only the annex operates independently.

Also, the fact that NO ONE has properly taken care of this for YEARS and prefers to look away... oh, I could go crazy.
Maybe it’s better to leave it alone.
Emotionally, I’m very attached to all of this and I suspect that if we don’t buy it, my parents won’t be able to keep it. My dad has been pushing for years and wants clear conditions, but my mother is listed in the land register with my grandmother.
And both seem to simply look away from this matter.

Of course, you can ask a notary. As an expert, he will explain it very detailedly for the corresponding money.
Everything that can be clarified before the inheritance should be clarified, as long as grandma wants that. After that, it gets complicated. Due to disputes in inheritance, this often ends with a court-enforced forced auction. That is the worst option in every respect.

If grandma does not want that, I would leave it all behind and look for property elsewhere to be independent from all that stuff. If then an inheritance comes, that’s good. If not, no problem.

Thank you very much for your brief but precise answer. That helped me a lot.

I will ask her in a quiet moment what her wish is regarding what happens with her house and land. Whether she doesn’t care or what she imagines.

I still can’t quite follow what the current ownership statuses are and who can still inherit what or not.

If you can only "not quite follow" that, you are way ahead of me. By my own estimate, I have understood at most an eighth. What I believe I have understood in summary is the following: 1. the OP lives in a house that is part of a complex interconnected conglomerate. 2. the complexity of the conglomerate is only topped by that of the future community of heirs. 3. she wants to buy this house out of the conglomerate, and that before the grandmother’s passing occurs. 4. the grandmother trusts that her foreseeable end of life will spare her from igniting this tense situation with a clarification.

My husband and I would like to own property so that we have something for our child in the future and as an investment for ourselves.

Given the above summary, I would look for a property that a) has no connection to the described real estate conglomerate and b) is out of earshot of the blast when the fragile family "peace" is shaken by the inheritance. Moreover, where according to the grandmother’s assessment, the blast is to be expected within the next two years.