Financing - Are we getting reasonable terms from the bank?

For financing in that magnitude, 1000 euros buffer per month is very little. But whatever. The OP probably won't get financing anyway.

Agreed with that

But if your wife opens her [shop] at home, then you don't need two cars anymore, right? o_O

So here with us, no bank would have done that either. When we started with [bauwunsch], my husband was also self-employed, with less net income but only a €190k loan. He alone had zero chance, together with a significant surcharge (with over 30% equity). Now everything belongs only to me, the equity was also only from me. I earned less net than he did but had a permanent contract and had been with the company for over 15 years, which is very solid. That really bothered my husband, on top of the already greater uncertainty of having to become an employee again.