Financing a single-family home solidly?

If you didn't have cars or only company cars with fuel cards, it would be possible. Otherwise, with 2 cars you easily have costs of 300-400 €.
Holidays with 2 children cost 200 € monthly, unless you didn't go on vacation abroad with the kids.
Cell phone + internet at least 50 € - yes, that's true.
That makes 650 € and 50% is gone.
Food easily 600 € monthly, unless they eat lunch at grandma's. Do you eat out? We don't.
Then also daycare, clothing, clubs for 50€???

- 2 cars no leasing, if anything together 150€ operating costs. I've had a private e-car for 5 years. Back then, without photovoltaics, storage and so on, all-in with service, insurance, and electricity, the car cost me 77€ p.m. Now it's even 25€ less because I hardly have electricity costs for the car. I can charge "free of charge" at home or at the employer.

- Back then 2 weeks at the campsite and last year 10 days at the Polish Baltic Sea in a holiday apartment of an acquaintance for 400€. This year in the Bavarian Forest.
Cell phone + internet at least 50 € - yes, that's true.
That makes 650 € and 50% is gone. - No, it doesn't.
- I don't know what you do, but judging by my wife's savings rate, no 400€ go into groceries. Do you eat out often?

Therefore, I can also say your expenses are too high and you could optimize. 200€ less for groceries means 2400€ more prepayments per year. Or 2400€ p.a. for a few photos and the wife not cooking 1-2 weeks. You can do that.

Just don't project yourself onto others. Your and our operating costs are simply different and both you and we are satisfied.

- 2 cars no leasing, if at all together 150€ operating costs. I've had an electric car privately for 5 years. Back then, without photovoltaics, storage and co, the car cost me all-in including service, insurance and electricity 77€. Now it's even 25€ less because I hardly have electricity costs for the car. I can charge at home or at the employer "for free."

- Back then 2 weeks at the campsite and last year 10 days at the Polish Baltic Sea in a holiday apartment of an acquaintance for 400€. This year in the Bavarian Forest.
Mobile + internet at least 50€ - yes, that's correct
We're at 650€ and 50% is gone. - No, we're not.
- I don't know what you do but judging by my wife's savings rate, there aren't 400€ for groceries.

Therefore I can also say, your expenses are too high and you could optimize. 200€ less for groceries means 2400€ more special repayment per year.

Well, we like to eat well and go to a restaurant at least once a month. Of course, we can optimize and I'm considering whether two cars are necessary when I have a commute of 8km to work. At our workplace, there is the possibility of a job bike. For example, you can get a 3,500€ e-bike for 60€ monthly. After 3 years you can buy it for 10% of the price. An electric car will also come for my wife eventually.

Besides, we like to travel abroad twice a year. Recently (before Corona) summer in Croatia and autumn in Sicily. With owning a house, of course, all this is less. We also go to the Polish Baltic Sea twice a year (as native Poles, a must).

Sure, we could save a lot, but as long as we don't have to, we don't.

We earned everything ourselves and our parents aren't very wealthy, which is why we also support them additionally.

Well, we like to eat well and go to a restaurant at least once a month. Of course, we can optimize it and I’m thinking about whether two cars are necessary when I have an 8 km commute to work. At our workplace, there is the option of a job bike. For example, you can get a €3,500 e-bike for €60 per month. After 3 years, you can buy it for 10% of the price. An electric car will also come for my wife at some point.

Besides, we like to go abroad twice a year. Recently (before Corona), summer in Croatia and autumn in Sicily. With a house, of course, all that becomes less. We also go twice a year to the Polish Baltic Sea (as native Poles, that’s a must).

Sure, we could save a lot, but as long as we don’t have to, we don’t.

You see, we don’t have to save either and we spend it but not on consumption.

My parents drove me all over Europe since I was little. That was because they themselves didn’t really get to travel back then, as you surely know, it wasn’t that easy in Poland. Those were all great experiences, so I myself don’t feel the need to somehow repeat everything.

Job bike is cool, I would do it if my employer wasn’t a leasing customer of the ZEG group. Job bike works with Canyon and Rose – lucky you.

You see, we also don't have to save anything and spend it, but not on consumption. My parents took me all over Europe since I was little. It was because they themselves couldn't really travel back then, as you surely know, it wasn't that easy in Poland. Those were all great experiences, so I myself have no need to somehow repeat it all. Jobrad is cool, I would do it if my employer wasn't a leasing customer of the ZEG group. Jobrad works with Canyon and Rose - lucky you.

It is currently like that with us just as it probably will be with your children :) But we are probably very off-topic.

Heyho,
the whole living cost discussion was also quite nice, but regarding the initial situation, I also see it as very solid. Even if you spend a few hundred euros more per month, 400k loan with just under 5,000 household income is a healthy constellation.

I also really struggle a lot with the loan amount in our project. In between, I try to tune out the big number on the statement a bit and rather look at whether it comfortably works out monthly. That helps to calm my rattling brain :)

And the future builder remains silent. :D